


Phantoms of Hatred

by roughknuckles, Saklani



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-01
Updated: 2015-05-17
Packaged: 2018-03-08 20:48:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 38,854
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3222953
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/roughknuckles/pseuds/roughknuckles, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Saklani/pseuds/Saklani
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tarsus IV remained a black mark against Starfleet and in the heart of Captain James T. Kirk.  He doesn't want to revisit the place, not even to memorialize the dead, but at least now he has Khan Noonien Singh to help him face his past...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Reveal

**Author's Note:**

> This is another completed story, which we decided to post even as we are continuing with our epic tale. This one isn't as long, but it is the start of a series.

James T. Kirk snuggled into the warm body of his lover, Khan Noonien Singh, and rested his head on a strong shoulder, stroking a hand over the broad chest of the man he loved so much. And that love was the only reason he found the courage to speak now…

“Starfleet has decided to have a ceremony on Tarsus IV,” he said, the words heavy in his mouth. “After twenty years, they’ve finally decided to come clean about what happened there and commemorate the dead. And they want me to attend, as one of the seven survivors of the genocide.” He shivered a little and tugged himself close to the other man, as memories clattered for attention in his head. “I’ve been debating it since they asked me, and I’ve finally decided I want to go...if you’ll come with me.”

The news had been quite startling to the calm companionship the two had been sharing. Sometimes, instead of filling their lives with conversation or outings, the two would just lay together in bed for a while. Cuddled close to one another, enjoying a peaceful hour or so. At times it would lead to a nap, at others, it would evolve into sex, but for the most part, it was intended to be a genuine means to feel secure in their partnership and to keep demons at bay.

And while many subjects had been discussed in the past, the genocide of Tarsus IV had certainly not been one of them before. "Jim?" Khan questioned, his fingers no longer gently messing with Jim's short hair. "What do you mean ... please explain?"

Jim blew out a harsh sigh and said, “Fuck,” in a quietly angry tone. “Sorry. This is just...even harder than I thought it would be. I’ve never told anyone all of it, not even the six other people who were with me...the other six survivors.” He turned his head and pressed his mouth into Khan’s warm shoulder to gather some composure.

When he found his resolve again, he lifted his face again and offered a weak smile at Khan. “Yeah, time hasn’t really made it any easier, but I think that’s partly cause I never faced up to it in the first place. And Starfleet didn’t make it any better, deciding to keep the whole thing quiet, not exposing how horribly wrong it had all gone.” He dropped his eyes a moment, knowing his lover still had his own misgivings about Starfleet. This would hardly help with that lingering distrust. “It’s been twenty years...it’s time for me to confront my demons, to try and put them behind me. But I can’t do that alone. I need you with me, Noonien, to face the places of my nightmares and to give me someone to tell about it all.” He made a rough, disgruntled noise. “Not to mention to help me get through a damned, official ceremony.”

Khan listened, but as Jim spoke it seemed like floodgates had been opened and he was getting more information then he knew what to do with. But there was disorder to it, and a great deal of detail missing.

Shifting in bed, Khan faced his lover and nuzzled his throat, then the side of his neck. It was a very canine behavior, wanting to put his partner at ease to show he was not alone. "Yes, Jim. You have me. I will listen, if you are ready to talk. And I will stand at your side, throughout." Jim would not be alone in this. Nor would he be abandoned to his demons.

“I don’t know if I’m ready...don’t know if I’ll ever be ready,” Jim confessed, lifting his chin to allow Khan to nuzzle to his heart’s content, an act that soothed them both. “But I have to someday and this damn ceremony’s a good opportunity...if anything about this can be called good.” He sighed a little at himself. “I know I’m not making a lot of sense. Just give me a moment to try to make sense of it myself.”

He fell silent again, cuddled close to Khan and pulled his thoughts back together. “I’ve told you about my family and all that crap,” he said, not wanting to go over the circumstances of his birth and his family’s mess again. One time had been hard enough. “I also told you how when I was twelve, my mother sent me to Tarsus IV to live with some cousins. But I never told you the rest...about what happened there. It started as the happiest time of my childhood, until the fungus hit all the crops.” He shivered at the memory, unable to stop himself. “They all began to wither and die. You’ll see, Tarsus is a long way from anywhere, even now. That’s why Ko-” he gritted his teeth together on the name he hadn’t spoken in twenty years “-Kodos,” he finally spit out, fury in his tone, “chose it.”

"In your own time, Jim." Khan assured. "I am here. I will always be here." The augment could be relied upon to be quite unmovable when he wanted to be. He was not the sort who got scared off. And was loyal to those he loved. Wrapping his arms around Jim, holding him close, Khan then rolled them so that Jim was on his back and Khan over him. Years ago, this might have been seen as a very dominant, maybe even intimidating, move, but as it was, Khan did this to give Jim something to focus on. To feel safe. Khan had him, completely. Trapped by the weight of his body and the strength of his arms. Nothing could get to Jim like this. There was only Khan. A living shield.

Jim interpreted it the same way and smiled up at Khan, framing his lover’s face in both hands and stroking the high cheekbones with his thumbs. “I know.” That was the foundation of their relationship, the steadfast knowledge that they were both loyal to their families and each of them were the strongest form of family possible to the other.

One day, Jim thought he’s even ask Khan to make it official in the sight of all formal laws, as well. But for now, telling him about Tarsus was as good as saying he believed their relationship would last.

“Governor Kodos,” Jim repeated, softer now. “He was the one who started the colony, a throwback to times with far less technology. And it was good place to live before the crops began to die off. But help seemed far, far away, once they did call for it. So, Kodos decided that everyone couldn’t be saved and that only he could decide who was worthy...and who wasn’t.” He chuckled, a harsh, brittle sound. “You’ll hate how he decided to choose.”

Turning his head slightly, Khan kissed the fingers upon his face. But otherwise his attention was completely upon Jim's words. After the human race had made first contact, Earth began to prosper in new ways. The population leaped forward, and Earth suddenly began to support not only human life, but that of other foundling races. So colonies sprung up across the galaxy. But Tarsus IV had been quite removed from the rest, with not even a nearby space station to offer means of support.

Something of a low growl began to grow already in his chest, as Khan did not like the implications of this topic. "How do you mean, worthy?"

Jim tugged at Khan’s head to rest their their foreheads together gently, eyes closing for a moment. “Yes, you’ve got the right of it, love. Or the wrong of it. He chose those whom he deemed better. Half of the eight thousand inhabitants of the planet. The other half had to die to secure the future of the rest. And he was pretty damned efficient at it, wasn’t he? Considering only seven of us made it.” He hiccuped a sob that he tried hard to suppress.

“Fuck, Noonien, I don’t know if I can do this,” he said, fighting to control himself and pushing his face into the curve of Khan’s neck. “I hate the idea of going back, of seeing that place again. The places where Kodos had people executed, before they even knew what was going on. My cousins...all of them. I tried to save Becky, who was six years old, but she pulled away from me and ran toward her mother and got caught up with the rest of them.”

There were aspects of humanity Khan would always be disgusted with. But this wasn't about him right now. So he pushed down his own anger to give Jim what he needed right now. "Jim." Khan said calmly, wanting him to focus only on his voice and not the feeling of distress. "No one is forcing you. We will go. Or we will stay. But on the anniversary of these events, whether it is here, in the form of a recorded message, or there, in the form of a public speech, I believe you should give your story voice. In place of all of those who cannot speak for themselves. Speak for those who have died, so that their stories are not forgotten."

Khan pressed a hand to the side of Jim's face, soothing a thumb along his temple. "You have lived with these ghosts for a long time, on your own. It is time that others knew their names and what happened on Tarsus IV."

Jim opened his eyes and regarded Khan with surprise. “You do?” He bit down on his lower lip, gaze turning somewhere inward, somewhere deep and dark. “I was asked to, of course,” he murmured more to himself than anyone else. “They had to ask me, given who I am, but I think they’d like for me to refuse.” He blinked back to look at his lover again, legs spreading to cradle Khan between his thighs now, relishing the strong weight on top of him. “You really think I should give that speech? I don’t know what I’d say. How to say enough or say it right, not to be too bitter about everything that followed.”

"Of course they want your silence. It is a shameful thing, a cruelty that humanity was meant to have overcome." Khan locked his arms on either side of Jim, keeping his gaze even at his lover started to fall back inside of himself. "Be angry. Be bitter. Let everyone know the truth of it. Bring to light the cover up. No one knows the truth of it, Jim. Except you and the other survivors. Honor the dead. Let the events be known, for the record, once and for all."

"They're going to reveal everything, Noonien," Jim said. "Late, but at least they've decided not to keep it all hidden anymore. I just- I need you there for me, to help me if I'm going to do this. If I have to stand up for everyone so long dead and face it all again...I need someone to support me, hold me to make sure I don't fall." He fisted his hands and pressed them against Khan's chest. "Damn everyone else. Please. Just be there for me, Noonien." He knew he'd have to be strong for everyone else, including the six survivors he'd supported through the massacre.

Kevin.

"One of the other survivors serves on the Enterprise, you know," he murmured. "Lieutenant Kevin Riley. When I found that he was in Starfleet, I made sure that he got assigned here, so I could watch after him. I'm so proud of how he's grown up. He's seven years younger than me, so he was seven, the youngest of us who lived."

"Jim, if you speak about the events, you will be protecting the memory of those who died from further defilement. In turn, I shall protect you." Khan said with a soft, promising growl. "I will not leave your side. Jim-" Khan took Jim by the hand and clasped their fingers together, fisting their hands in the bedsheets. "You will not stand alone. The others will look to you for leadership, to be strong. And when you are weary of it, you are to look to me." It was nearly an order, but Khan meant it only to show how serious he was. Jim was not to hide away, to retreat inside of himself when things became difficult, instead, he was meant to look to Khan to take care of him when it became difficult to care for himself.

Jim smiled a little in the face of Khan’s protectiveness, hearing the words as Khan intended them, a feat of communication that had taken a lot of time to develop between them. Jim had found Khan overbearing and bossy at first, until he learned that Khan was trying to take care of him in the only way he knew how. “Thank you, Noonien. That is what I needed to hear.” He kissed his left earlobe and scraped his teeth over the scrap of skin.

“I’d like- well, I think I need to look over the places on Tarsus- our hideouts, the towns we raided and where I used to live. I don’t really want to,” Jim said and nuzzled at the curve of his neck, “but I should. I’ve been debating going before or after the speech. It might make giving the speech harder than ever, but the thought of going when there’s anyone except you around...no, I think it has to be before. Just you and me, so only you’ll see when I make a fool of myself.”

"You will not be seen as a fool in my eyes, Jim." Khan bowed his head and kissed Jim on the shoulder. "You are confronting a very dark and deadly time of your life. But I believe, it will make your words that much stronger when you speak." Nuzzling his face against Jim's neck, Khan shifted once more so that he was laying beside his lover, arms wrapped around him and face pressed close. "Thank you for telling me, Jim." He said in a whisper, knowing that Jim had been keeping this secret to himself for a long time.

Jim turned his head to lightly kiss Khan’s mouth and whispered a question, “You want to make love to me, Noonien? I’d like to feel your strength, your love for me.” He turned on his side and wrapped his leg around his lover, tugging himself closer. “Please take care of me.” He seldom asked this of Khan, asked to be able to surrender to himself completely to the augment’s strength for awhile.

"Yes, Jim-" Khan said as he let a hand slip between their bodies, palming his stomach and moving down to his hips. The desire for sex might seem a strange request to outside eyes considering the weight of their previous conversation. But Khan understood his lover well. Jim was looking to feel connected, to feel taken care of. To feel someone like Khan, with all his strength and power, use said strength and power to give him pleasure and help him feel alive. "I will take care of you."

 

*            *            *

 

Jim linked a hand with one of Khan’s the instant they finished materializing on Tarsus IV. It had taken special permission from Starfleet, who had quarantined the planet since the massacre, but that had been easily obtained. Jim had even invited Kevin, but the younger man had turned bleach white and refused, shaking all over. He didn’t blame his former charge, thinking that the ceremony itself would be difficult enough to bear.

“This is where I lived with my cousins,” he told Khan softly. “The town was called Greenville, and when first I got here, it was.” He looked around them and made a small, hurt noise. “Like it is now. They cured the fungus a few years after we were all evacuated. Actually, it was Vulcan research mostly. They couldn’t understand the sheer illogic of everything that had happened… It’s like that was their way of dealing with it. Strange how different people react to the same event.”

He took a step down the small hill that would lead them to the remains of the town, slowly weathering away since the planet had been deserted. Without any need to question the way, he led Khan toward the house he had lived in for a little over one happy year. But he knew Khan could feel the small tremors through his fingers, his fear and sorrow in the movements he couldn’t control.

The planet was lonely and stripped of any heart. Khan could see it for himself. So it was a small mercy then, that the planet had remained quarantined off, so that future generations did not have to live with such a horrific history looming over their daily lives. "Tell me about the fungus? How was it introduced? How fast did it germinate? What did it look like?" These were subjects of public knowledge, but Khan asked to keep Jim focused, wanting him to talk out the process of events from the beginning. And it began with the global destruction of crops.

“The Vulcans determined it had been here all along, that it was native to the planet,” Jim said and tightened his fingers around Khan’s hand. “It was an unfortunate chance series of events- the weather, the spores in the dirt and the crops for the fungus to grow on. And at first, it didn’t even seem that bad. But from one day to the next, it seemed like the stuff was everywhere.” He swallowed hard and shuddered from head to toe. “It was red and dry and when the wind blew, it covered everything in bronze dust.”

Jim stopped in front of a ramshackle building, the walls leaning a bit to the right and the roof half-caved in. He turned toward the house and stared at it, eyes wide as saucers. “This is where I lived, Noonien. My cousins were kind to me...made me feel like I really had a family.”

It was an important fact, Khan believed, as the fungus was not a biological weapon introduced by an outside party, but was the planet protecting itself from non-native agriculture. There was no one to blame, there. The blame came later in how such an emergency was handled. With a light squeeze of their hands, Khan assured Jim that he was still there, that he was not about to leave his side. "I have no doubt they were, Jim. But there is more to family then blood." Khan reminded him gently. It was not meant to dismiss what Jim had with his cousins, but to remind him that he was not alone, he had a different kind of family now, with the Enterprise and with Khan.

“I know. I don’t even know why they agreed to take me off my mother’s hands,” Jim said softly. “I’d just gotten kicked out of yet another school. I was always bored...too far ahead of everyone else not to be. Even now, Iowa doesn’t exactly have the best education options for someone like me.” He tossed a small smile, the first on the planet, at Khan. “Even though I know you’re still better.”

With a deep breath, he took a step toward the remains of the house, walking up the path. “I’d just gotten home from the school here when we got the first message from Governor Kodos about the severity of the fungus and asked to assemble at the town hall.” He froze in place just outside the front door, which hung at an angle. “I’ve heard that Starfleet is debating keeping the capital, where Kodos lived, in a permanent state of arrested decay, a sort of memorial park...I don’t know how I feel about that.”

Khan listened without interruption of Jim's telling of events. Of how he had come to Tarsus, and the emotional troubles he was already facing at this time in his life. But he tried to share the smile Jim offered him, pleased at least that Jim teasing him like this still made him happy, even here.

Keeping hold of Jim by one hand, Khan reached out and touched the door with the other, letting his swing open. The way was open to Jim, if he wanted, but Khan would not force him forward. "It is a powerful thing, Jim. To see a building still in existence, where there was once destruction and lives were lost. I imagine you would want it burned to the ground..." Khan said, turning his eyes upon Jim alone, "but as satisfying as that might be in the short term, your memories will remain with you...and only with you. Keeping the capital in all of it's decay may serve as a reminder to future generations, to see with their own eyes what happened here." For similar reasons, the Auschwitz-Birkenau concentration camps had been left standing after the war to serve as a reminder of humanity at its lowest. Providing tours and education to future generations so that the events within the walls of the death camp were not forgotten, nor repeated.

Jim nodded and said, “Yes, I know. I’ve thought about that...reminding people of atrocities might help prevent similar events in the future. Still, as one of the survivors, it’s a somewhat creepy notion.” He sighed and slowly turned to walk around the structure, not trusting it not to collapse on them both if they went inside. “I had the top bedroom. I never got there again.” He pointed at a small window on the second floor and kept circling to the backyard, where he paused again to look at the wild riot of plants growing there now. “This was always so neat when I was a kid. Even after the fungus began to get things, Cousin Ruth always kept her garden neat.”

"Would you like to tidy up a section of it? In memory of your cousins?" Khan asked, wondering if it might benefit Jim to be able to actively put his hands into the soil and fix a small portion of it. To have some resemblance of control to put right something that had gone wrong. Though on the other hand it was likely a very startling idea that Jim was bound to reject as a knee-jerk reaction. But Khan wanted to present the idea that Jim could still influence something here, if he wanted.

Jim shook his head after a moment of consideration and moved to lean against Khan for a second. “There’s nothing left of her garden now. These are all wild plants- volunteers. I recognize them from when we were living off anything we could get. Some of them were edible...even for me.”

He continued to walk, Khan’s hand in his, around the rest of the house and then down the front path to the street again. “Nobody had any reason to wonder at Kodos calling us to the Town Hall. There was a state of emergency, and everyone expected that some sort of measures would have to be taken. So, we all just walked, cattle to the slaughter, to hear his broadcast.”

The streets were as much of a mess as the houses, torn up in rough chunks, but Jim moved without pause for the largest building in the small mass of houses. He gazed at it through eyes that hurt from aching redness at the memories. “Fuck,” he breathed, as it loomed ahead of them both, the years barely seeming to have weighed on its stony exterior. “Like nothing’s changed.”

Khan took in the sight of the building, but as Jim became consumed by the image in front of him, one that likely haunted so many of his dreams, Khan stepped in front of him. He stood very close, blocking his view for a moment, "It is just us, remember." He said, wanting to assure him that no one else was there, no one to do them harm. Khan raised a hand to the side of Jim's face, palm warm against his skin. His eyes were sharp and searching, "We do not need to continue.”

Jim lifted his head to look into Khan’s eyes and then pushed forward for a brief hug, eyes closing to just bask in the presence of his lover for a moment. Even on Tarsus, with the darkness of his memories around him, Khan’s presence could push away everything else and bring Jim back to the moment, to his current reality- that he had a ship, a crew and a lover who cared for him above all else.

Thus reassured and brought back to himself, Jim stepped back and looked up into Khan’s eyes with a faint smile. “Thank you, Noonien, but I want to go on, please. I’ll never do it, if we don’t now…” He raised his head to kiss Khan briefly and then stepped back to face the building again.

“We all walked inside together, the whole town...and everywhere else on Tarsus, all the others were doing the same.” Jim led Khan toward the building and headed up the stone steps to the doors, grasping one and pulling, groaning when it didn’t budge. “A little help?”

Reaching out, Khan pulled at the door as well. Though he did not use such force to rip it from its hinges, but just enough so that it would still feel like Jim had managed it himself. "Who were you standing with? Your cousins? Playmates?" Khan asked, encouraging Jim to think upon the individuals that had surrounded him, rather than the events that tore them apart.

Jim stepped inside the large hall, which was dusty and contained only a few scraps of ruined furniture. “Yes, my cousins were all there, but so was everyone else. My friends and their families. Hoshi Sato, who was a former Starfleet officer, on the very first Enterprise.” Jim’s breath hitched a little. “She taught me languages- Klingon, Vulcan, Cardassian- she was a genius, better even than Uhura. The first true xenolinguistic genius in Starfleet. And Kodos declared that she was to be killed because of her age. How could he even think that? She was still brilliant, still amazing.” His voice broke a little, but he fought his way back.

“The head of the town read a statement from Kodos. I can still remember it word for word. ‘Survival depends on drastic measures. Your continued existence represents a threat to the well-being of society. Your lives mean slow death to the more valued members of the colony. Therefore, I have no alternative but to sentence you to death.’” Jim glanced at his lover. “You can imagine the terror and chaos that followed that announcement, once people realized it was true and not some horrible joke.”

"Yes-" Khan could imagine, "but it was not true. Then, now, or ever." The augment said firmly. There was a great deal of trauma there, that would never be seen as easily as bruises or broken bones. To be told your life had no worth, no value, to have it resonate in your memory your entire life, it was a wound almost impossible to heal. "Do not try to rationalize his thinking, Jim. All of you had worth. You, had worth. Kodos had no right to declare otherwise." And it wasn't just Jim's lover speaking in defense of those who had died, but Khan the Emperor of one-quarter of Earth's population, protective as ever.

“Part of what makes it so terrible is the four thousand who followed him,” Jim whispered and deeply haunted look flashed over his expression. “I didn’t know it then, how deeply inoculated so many of the population was to his theories of eugenics.” He barked a terrible laugh. “Eugenics, yet! As if that wasn’t a lesson humans hadn’t had to relearn multiple times already.”

Jim moved back into Khan’s arms again, trying to absorb the words that he had value, that his life was not worthless. “Say it again, Noonien. Please.” The worst was yet to come, and he wanted the strength to bolster himself.

Had Khan truly been canine, he would have folded his ears back and tucked his tail for perhaps the only time in his life. The augments and the Eugenics War had served as a long standing cautionary tale for humanity. But even so, some men were still drawn to the concept, and instead of morally exploring such ideas, to be held in the light for once, it remained a dark and devastating affair. Augmented and engineered humans remained the subject of villainy. But even for his own role in the history of eugenics, Khan showed Jim only love. Holding him tightly around the back, Khan pressed his lips to Jim's neck, kissing and speaking just before his ear, not in secret whispers, but firmly. "Every single one of you is worthy of this universe. Your life is precious. You have worth, Jim. Your life has value and no one has the right to take it from you."

Jim pressed his own lips to Khan’s face and murmured, “I shouldn’t have said what I did...about eugenics,” as if just realizing that he’d probably hurt Khan with his careless words. “I’m so glad I have you, Noonien. So lucky.” His words were on top of Khan’s as they each sought to soothe the other. With a gentle hand on his right cheek, he pressed their mouths together for a lingering kiss. “I’m ready to go on,” he said after a few more moments of just holding on to his lover.

He took a deep breath and kept going. “I don’t remember what I thought, just that I knew we had to get out of here. The building was sealed behind us when we came in- nobody had even noticed- so when the guards starting firing from the upper story, there was nowhere to go. They went after the adults first; they were larger targets and probably the people they worried about most. And I dragged my cousin to the corner because I saw the air duct.” He pointed at an opening, the grate missing, but the narrow space was still in evidence. But I couldn’t hold her and get the grate off, and she was screaming and trying to get to her mother...and I lost her.” And now, he felt the damning wetness from his eyes and down his cheeks. “I got a few of the other kids in, but my cousins...they were all shot down.”

With a long hard look at the air duct, Khan silently marveled at such quick thinking from the childhood version of Jim. It would have been a tight fit, even for a child, but it no other options, except to be crushed and smothered by those who were dying, it was a very rational choice. Even without knowing where the ductwork would lead them to, it had been a chance worth taking. "Show me where this goes? Where on the outside did you exit?"

And Jim showed him the path he and ten other children (four of of whom would still not make it off of Tarsus) escaped the massacre of their family and friends, the end of the lives they knew. He led Khan up the path out of town, on which he had led the party into the hills surrounding the town and further. They went from place to place, in the patterns Jim had used to avoid the soldiers that had hunted them, until they were called away to the larger towns, where fighting had broken out among the survivors on both sides. On all sides. Kodos’ control fell apart and everyone panicked, attacking each other mercilessly, even though one group sent out a distress call, the one Starfleet answered at last.

But once the soldiers were gone, there was still the matter of food. Jim had nearly killed himself a few times trying to find things that were edible for the others. He fell apart describing the death of the first of the children, the youngest and weakest, who had finally succumbed to disease, despite everything the others tried to save him. And after that, Jim starved himself even more to make sure the others had as much as possible.

He described the first man he had killed, a lone person he didn’t recognize, digging through the town for any scraps, the same way Jim was. But he had attacked without pause, and Jim had ended up knifing him. There was a more chilling lack of expression to this description, but Jim had never taken life easily, nor did he ever plan to.

And finally, he described the arrival of Starfleet, the uniformed officers whom they had avoided for a few days, before their superior technology and health allowed them to catch the first of Jim’s group. He had tried to get her back and discovered that these people were actually here to help, even though it had taken several days and much pleading on their part for him to believe and carefully herd the rest of his charges from their hiding place.

It ended back near where they started, when Jim had been loaded on to a transport with the rest of the children, headed for the USS Intrepid and their relatives. For Jim, heading for a brief reuniting with his mother, Winona, and then re-marooning in Iowa with his hated stepfather, Frank.

Jim slumped, emotionally and physically exhausted, against Khan as he finally finished his narrative, grateful to have it over, but also, feeling just the bit lighter for having finally revealed the truth. He tucked his head on Khan’s shoulder and shut his eyes, putting himself in the care of his lover for the moment, needing and wanting that support again. “And now, you’re the first person I’ve ever told it all.”


	2. Recuperate

With both arms around him, Khan hummed softly as a means of distracting his lover. It was all said and done now. And while Jim could never be truly free of it,he had unburdened himself of the secret, which hopefully helped him not feel so responsible for holding onto it so tightly, but allowed him to let go a little. Cupping the back of his head, Khan massaged his fingers against Jim's skull, keeping him close, safe and cared for. "You are alright, Jim." He said, reminding him in a way that just because he had retold those terrible events, did not mean he had to relive them completely. "You are amazing, you've done so well. Are you ready to go?" Jim had faced the ghosts there on Tarsus. He faced the terror of his childhood, and survived, again. 

“I need a minute,” Jim admitted. A little time to pull himself together so he could walk down the halls of the Enterprise to his quarters with his shoulders square, backbone straight and head high. Once there, he could allow himself to collapse again on the strength of Khan, but he didn’t want to show his weakness to the others.

“When we’re back in my quarters, will you take a bath with me?” he asked, thinking of how soothing it would be to be immersed in warm water and held by strong arms against an even stronger body. “Take care of me again...like you did last night?” He knew he was asking a lot, putting a lot on Khan’s shoulders, but thought the augment would not mind, might even like the responsibility.

"Yes, Jim. Anything you need." Khan said, still petting his fingers against the back of Jim's head. He would hold Jim like this until the nearest star became a supergiant and devoured the planet. He would remain, for as long as Jim wished. And once they were back aboard the Enterprise, Khan would attentively care for Jim in every way he knew the man needed. Jim was his family, and Khan always took care of his family. 

“I’m glad we have a day more until the memorial,” Jim confessed into the strength of Khan’s ams. “I don’t think I could face it tomorrow. But starships will start to arrive, and I’ll have to do the diplomacy thing, and I’m not doing it without you. Which means...no growling at Admirals, all right? I know you don’t like them, but they get all edgy, and then you get edgier and then I get all anxious and start babbling and it’s really a downward spiral from there, right?” He lifted his face and managed one of his real smiles at Khan. “I need you there, Noonien. I won’t make it without you, even for boring diplomatic chit chat. So, you’ll just look menacing, right?”

It was a weak attempt at teasing, but he was trying to pull himself together.

A quiet rumble rolled out of Khan's throat at being told he couldn't growl at Starfleet Admirals. But he nodded once in acknowledgement of his orders. He would not actively provoke confrontation, nor allow the usual slights paid him any attention. It was not about him. Khan was to be deaf and blind to all, but Jim's care. With the pad of his thumb, Khan lightly brushed the middle of Jim's lower lip as he savoured his smile. "I am yours to command, Jim." Khan would stand silently at his side, or clear the room within seconds of Jim asking for it, either way, Jim would have his loyal and devoted support. 

Anytime Khan said something in that vein, it made Jim shiver, as he did now, in pleasure and pride. To think the powerful augment would take orders from anyone, including himself. He used the strong, positive emotions to bolster himself and ask for transport back to the Enterprise with Khan by his side, though no longer in his arms.

He strode through the hallways, back straight and head tall, as he wanted, headed straight for his quarters and aware of Khan with him every step. When the doors finally closed behind him, he began to tear out of his clothes. “I want the dust of that place off me,” he said by way of explanation. “And to get to our bath as soon as possible.” He paused, mostly naked, and turned imploring eyes to Khan. “If you will.”

"Of course, Jim." Khan said as he approached his lover. Then half kneeling down, Khan began to undo his own boots, then began to untie Jim's boots as well while he was down there. "I'll try not to make it too hot for you." Khan said as he stood again, stripping himself of his own shirt. In the past, Khan had drawn a shared bath for them both, only to realize what Khan considered nice and warm, was scalding and intolerable to his human companion. 

“But not so you’re getting cold, too,” Jim said with a warm smile in Khan’s direction. “I want it comfortable for us both. He kicked off his boots and then toed off all the rest, following after Khan in unashamed nudity. He pressed against his lover briefly and then washed his face at the sink, hands trembling.

Lifting his head, he looked into his own reflection, water still trickling down his face. “I still ask myself if I did everything I could on Tarsus. If I shouldn’t have tried to save more people. If I couldn’t have saved the kids in my care who died.” He rubbed his hands over his eyes and made a muffled noise of pain. “Dream about it.”

Khan drew the water in the bath, setting the temperature manually, though as it poured, tapped a button to increase the heat by a few more degrees. Sitting on the edge of the tub, Khan listened to Jim voice his doubts. "It should never have been your responsibility to begin with." Khan said as he stood and approached Jim from behind. He placed a slightly damp hand from the bathwater on Jim's back, the touch was a sort of warning for Jim not to be startled by the fact that Khan was moving up behind him. "But you did what you could, Jim. You survived."

“Is that enough?” Jim asked and turned to face his lover, arms going around him automatically. “There’ve been times in my life where I thought I didn’t deserve to live, when the others died.” He pressed his forehead to Khan’s right shoulder, head bowed. “Sometimes, I wish I had seen Kodos’ body, knew for sure that he was killed in the violence in the capital.” He gritted his teeth again against the wave of anger. “I do understand what it is to hate someone so much that you wanted nothing more than to see them dead.”

Khan knew something about such anger and the need for resolution, at whatever cost. But the two went about it very different ways, as killing came very easily to Khan, where it was not so with Jim. Killing Marcus had been necessary, for Khan and for his people. Though crushing his skull in with his bare hands had been a very personal touch born of pure rage. "Perhaps the ceremony and events of the anniversary will help resolve these issues for you, in place of having seen Kodos dead."

Jim made a soft noise of laughter and lifted his head to look into Khan’s eyes. “Never thought I’d see the day where you thought one of the brass’ ideas was a good one.” He sighed and slumped against Khan for a closer hug, before asking, “Is the bath ready? I could use a nice, long, warm soak now in your arms. Just not have to keep myself upright any longer. And wash off all traces of Tarsus again.”

Khan made a drastically sour face at the comparison. "I will ignore that." He said, giving Jim a gentle push towards the tub. Since the tub filled itself automatically, it had stopped now that it was full, tough Khan placed his hand in to test the water, just to be certain the temperature gauge had not malfunctioned. "Yes, here-" Khan said as he got in first, sinking down into the water with his knees parted to either sides of the tub for Jim to sit against him and between his parted thighs. 

Jim laughed softly at Khan’s grumpiness and then climbed into the bath, groaning with pleasure as he sank into the warm depths and then leaned against his lover. “I wouldn’t mind if you could find some room in your heart not to hate the organization I represent,” he confessed and nuzzled into Khan’s neck, kissing it softly between words. “I know you were treated badly by some, but I still believe in the ultimate worthiness of it all. If I didn’t, I would have stolen you and your crew and hauled you as far away from everything as I could.”

"Hm." Khan lifted his chin as Jim nuzzled him, pretending to still be grumpy, though a little smile was now settled in the corner of his mouth indicating his true feelings. "You represent Starfleet well, Jim. It is to your standard that I hold the rest." He said, wrapping his arms around Jim's middle, finally giving in to the affectionate nudges by kissing Jim on the side of the face.

Jim smiled with both mouth and eyes and looked at Khan with the warmth of his regard. “Yeah, see, when you talk like that, I feel better about everything.” He reached for their favorite soap (and what a hilarious debate that had been) and began to lather up Khan’s arms, inviting the augment to take over just by the way he touched him, light and tender. “And what with this bath to wash away all of the dirt and aches...things are looking up.” 

"Lay back, Jim- I will take care of you. Close your eyes and relax." Khan aid, beginning to work up a warm lather of soap which he first began to work over Jim's chest, scrubbing in small circles over his torso. Several times Khan kissed the back of his head or shoulder, but did not allow himself to get too distracted from his intention, which was to help distract Jim and make him feel good. 

Jim sighed contentedly when Khan took over washing him and relaxed even further into his arms. He did shut his eyes and focused on the sensation of Khan’s hands spreading lather all over his body. The kisses heightened his pleasure, and his body responded to Khan’s proximity and touch like it usually did, fire banking hotter with every knowing touch, until he ached between his legs. But he didn’t urge or rush his lover, trusting Khan to handle him as he needed to be handled this day. He did throw one arm out behind him though to lock around the back of Khan’s neck, hitching himself up to kiss at his face and whisper, “Love your touch so much, Noonien. You make me feel so good. Just wash away everything else but you.”

"Yes, Jim." Khan said, rising some of the lather away from his lover's body. And so, as he rinsed away the soap from his shoulder, Khan placed his mouth on the base of his neck and began to use his tongue there instead. Keeping the skin warm and wet with his mouth, Khan sucked and licked up to the back of his ear. Here he gave a soft, mischievous sort of growl to suggest that Jim was entirely his. With his head pressed close like this, Khan could see over Jim's shoulder and down his front. It pleased him greatly, as he could watch Jim react as he took extra care to wash between his thighs.

Jim understood Khan’s intentions, too, and moaned at the delicious touches between his legs, spreading them wider apart. He planted his feet on either side of Khan’s legs, splaying himself open for all the attention Khan was willing to give. The growl made him try to press impossibly closer to the augment, even though he smiled a little at the sound. “Getting all growly on me, Noonien? Just me here, baby. Nobody you need to prove to that I’m yours. I know it already.” He kissed at Khan’s cheek and mouth, humming quietly to himself as he does. “Nobody else for me now.”

It had taken the two lovers some time to become familiar with one another in this way, but Jim always had the right soothing words to keep Khan from getting too worked up. Khan being overly possessive could sometimes be dangerous, rather than fun. "Yes, Jim." Khan purred, gently biting at a spot just behind Jim's jaw. With a shift and roll of his hips, Khan kept his own erection pinned against Jim's backside while he massaged his sack between the flesh of his thumb and three fingers with one hand, and teased the head of his cock with the other. 

Jim groaned and rolled his hips as much as he could into Khan’s cock, wanting it inside him. Like the night before, he longed for his lover to show his possessive nature, to demonstrate to Jim how much he cared for him and the strength he would use to protect him from anything. Even old fears without form or shape to physically threaten. 

The hands at his own sack and cock made him moan again, pleasure and want mixed together. Khan drove him mad with his knowing touches, even as they delighted him by equal amounts. And they were just what he needed, driving away everything else except the immediate sensations of the now. Washing away the gritty despair of the day, the clinging memories. “Please, Noonien,” he whispered. “Please.”

Khan was immensely relieved that Jim was reacting so well to him, in his usual way. The events on Tarsus had run deep in Jim for many years, but thankfully one day back had not ruined him to feeling pleasures and finding goodness in the world again. Even so, Khan did not take his role in their partnership lightly. He would help erase Jim's mind of everything but the taste of each others lips and the heat of their lovemaking if he could.

"Yes?" Khan smiled, hidden against Jim's shoulder. "Look at you ... do you want me to open you up further?" He knew the answer of course, but he did enjoy how Jim had locked his ankles around his legs, keeping his thighs parted. So with a single finger, obscured by the distortion of the water, Khan began to gently tease his ass, lightly fingering the tight muscle. "I should have you ride my finger and come in my hand. Then take you again in bed."

Like Jim will object to that suggestion!

“Yes! Please, Noonien! I want that so bad,” Jim pleaded, unashamed to let Khan see how much pleasure he took from their couplings. That had also taken time, a careful building of their relationship in baby steps. Jim had never been shy about sex, about anything that got him the physical pleasure he had sought from the first time he’d realized what else his cock was for. But letting emotion enter the equation had definitely taken some time, even between himself and Khan. They had learned to trust each other, until Jim was as entirely free with his feelings as he was with his body, showing Khan openly how much he needed and wanted him.

He thought in his more lucid moments that it was probably good for Khan anyway. A family member to take care of and protect, one who openly wanted and needed him. 

And Jim did need him right now. Tarsus was far away when Khan touched him, but could creep back in at any time, if a single chance was given it. But Khan always could keep everything else at bay.

“Come with me here, too?” Jim asked. “I know you can come many more times than I, Noonien. Please don’t hold back! Please.” He bit at Khan’s jawline.

"Good. So do I." Khan rubbed the tip of his finger over Jim's ass, stimulating the muscle and getting it to relax. He enjoyed the process of getting Jim to open up to him, even when his words were extremely willing from the start, these things still took time. And Khan was happily devoted to the task. In a way, Khan was accustomed to taking care of millions at one time, then, just under one hundred. And now, all that was left was Jim. The only family he still had, and therefore deeply loved and fiercely protected.

"Do that again, Jim." Khan always enjoyed it whenever Jim gave little playful bites, it was often enough to keep him hard without any further stimulation.

Jim huffed a laugh at Khan’s demand and nipped at his lower lip, the angle odd, but fun to try nonetheless. He sucked at the tender skin and tugged at it with care. Despite Khan’s augmented toughness, he never wanted to inflict any kind of damage to him, either. 

“Noonien,” Jim groaned, loosing his hold on Khan’s lip for the moment, and pressed back into the teasing finger. “I want you inside me.” He nibbled at him again, eagerly trying to tilt his hips to allow for easier penetration. His lover was all care and tenderness, sometimes needing an extra push to get going.

With a pleasurable hum of his own, Khan keep an arm hooked around Jim's middle, enjoying the feeling of him squirming against him as he got worked up, wanting more. With a few careful probes, Kan pressed a single finger past the delicious tightness, until he was sinking easily into his body. "Good, Jim." Khan purred, holding him like this, skewered on his single digit. Then with his other hand, Khan reached down once more and began to massage the underside of his cock, delicately working his fingers over his length.

Jim huffed a soft laugh at Khan’s praise, his favorite for their couplings. But he liked it, too, knowing Khan found his reactions satisfying. Not that he could help them with Khan so easily playing his body. And the first breach always made him relax, paradoxically, since it told him that Khan still wanted him, still enjoyed their lovemaking. And that’s what Jim had finally dubbed it in his head- something beyond the purely physical sex he’d had before.

“I like being good for you,” Jim said and continued to try and nip and bite at Khan’s skin. “And bad, when you want that, too.” He continued to wriggle and fight to get more sensations, also deliberately rubbing against Khan’s erection when he could. If his lover decided to keep him still, Jim wouldn’t be able to stop him, so for now, he wanted to get in his own.

Khan found it erotic and exciting to hold Jim in his arms while his lover would squirm or buck his hips with eager anticipation. He liked feeling the natural reaction from Jim, so closely pressed to his own body. As in contrast, Khan was not the sort to writhe or gasp during their lovemaking, instead he was generally subdued and reserved. And certainly not as chatty as Jim was, but he did try at times to be more vocal. "You know I enjoy you, both ways ... but right now, I want you to be good, Jim. I don't want you to fight or resist me ... I want you to give in to pleasure until you forget your own name." Khan said, licking and sucking his neck as he fingered him with ease until he began to introduce the idea of two fingers instead of the one. 

“No fighting,” Jim promised on a moan and a buck. “Can’t help how I react sometimes, though. I need you so bad tonight, Noonien. I don’t want to remember anything except you. Just you.” He always tried to reward Khan when he went the extra mile to be more vocally involved in their intimate relations. Not that he wasn’t a good lover (an amazing one physically), but Khan still kept a distance that had often irked Jim in their first couplings. He’d been uncertain if the other man even enjoyed himself sometimes, despite the shared orgasms. It had nearly caused a rift between them, especially since Jim himself was so vocal and demonstrative. 

"Now then, since you are being so good-" Khan smirked and gave a gentle bite of Jim's ear, not with his teeth, but with his lips. "I want you to reach down and guide my hand, Jim. Show me how far you want me to go." Khan wanted Jim to participate, to show just how deep he wanted Khan's fingers, and if he wanted them pressed up his ass at all times, or if he wanted them to ease in and out. And aside from that, it kept Jim's hands busy, touching Khan, which he thrived on. 

“Nnnnn, fuck, Noonien,” Jim whispered at the order, but reached behind him to carefully take hold of Khan’s wrist. “Slide them in and out.” He demonstrated by guiding with his own hand, the position awkward and forcing him even more into contact with Khan. “Deep. Such nice fingers, Noonien. Long and strong. Can make me come with them... fuck...you know you can. Done it before.” He whimpered and arched his back more, pressing his ass into the conquering fingers. He finally let go, the position a little too uncomfortable to maintain, but continued to work his hips in demonstration.

"Good." Now that he had an idea of pace and depth Jim was craving, Khan delivered. He fingered his inviting hot ass, deep and steady. Which did drive Khan slightly crazy as he drowned in the new pheromones Jim was giving off. Dragging his tongue over Jim's shoulder, Khan sucked at the water from his skin, enjoying the warm, wet taste of Jim in his mouth. "Gorgeous, Jim." He said while his free hand began to move up the length of his chest, thumb nail lightly scratching over his nipple. 

Jim whined at the attentions and worked himself against the fingers almost desperately. He threw an arm behind him to grasp around Khan’s neck for some much needed grounding, even as his other hand moved aimlessly in the water, fingers twitching in time to Khan’s movements inside him. “Want more,” he pleaded. “Let me come, Noonien?”

"Let you, hm?" Khan scratched his hand down Jim's front until he was kneading and clawing with the pads of his fingers against his stomach. "Let you?" He repeated as he took Jim's eager cock in his hand and gave it a firm squeeze around the base before starting to work him over. "Yes ... yes, I think I will let you." Khan nuzzled his shoulder and kissed his neck. "Now, push back Jim. Push back, I want to feel you throb around my fingers when you come."

Jim knew Khan enjoyed being in command and for himself, sometimes needed Khan in that position. So, the orders do not go awry. Instead, he used his feet to shove himself backward, fully impaling himself on the strong hand. He screamed in pleasure as he also allowed himself to come at the same time. It was a near white out experience, especially capping a day such as his, but Jim held on to consciousness to fully enjoy the entire orgasm. Not to mention the way Khan cared for him through and after it.

The water was cloudy with soap, but now had erratic white ribbons floating near the surface from where both men had cum. "Yes, Jim-" Khan watched his lover eagerly as he let himself go. "Beautiful ... I have you ... oh yes, Jim ... I have you ..." Khan held him with tender care as each pulse shook his body, nerves still trembling at the slightest touch. "My Jim, I have you-" Khan kissed his neck, pressing his face firmly against skin so that he was breathing against him, wanting Jim to know he was close, and would remain so. 

“Yes, you do,” Jim whispered when he finally slumped against his lover in satiated relaxation. “You take such good care of me, Noonien, especially when I need you so badly.” He pressed a kiss to Khan’s jawline and then just let his entire body collapse. “Mmmm, just going to nap here til next year. Wake me then.”

He was vaguely aware that Khan had climaxed, too, and quietly took pride in that. He’d barely touched the augment, beyond his wild bucking. He wasn’t really in the right position to, even if he’d had the ability in the moment.

"Very well, until next year." Khan said quietly, still keeping his face pressed close. "Sleep well." Khan eased his arms around Jim's middle, holding him in so that their bodies were still pressed close instead of letting Jim float away from him. With his calm voice and strong arms, Khan gave the impression that he could very well hold his lover for years. 

Jim chuckled softly at the answer and opened bleary eyes to look up at Khan. “Guess we can’t do that, huh? Want to drain the water and really wash off?” He yawned and stretched himself out with a low groan. “I can even help out this time, what ya say?” 

"No, Jim. Not really. After a few days you might find that laying in a pool of water with me will lose its romantic appeal." But Khan had understood his meaning anyway, Jim felt comfortable with him, just the way they were, and wanted to hold onto that feeling for as long as he could. "But I agree, we should use the shower features, rinse off and head to bed."

Jim laughed again, loving Khan’s brutal seriousness, and lifted his head to kiss Khan’s cheek again, sloppy. “You’re my favorite,” he said. “I love you so fucking much, you know that, right?” He pressed his forehead briefly to Khan’s and then attempted to get his feet under himself to stand up. “Shower and bed. Winning combination when combined with Noonien.” 

He hoped his lover still wanted to engage in a second round of sex, as he wanted to be claimed again by the augment. He needed that physical connection to Khan; the solid feel of Khan’s big cock inside his body, which was already prepped for him. 

At being told he was loved, Khan lowered his eyes and gave a much softer smile. It was the closest reaction he would ever come to appear embarrassed. "Yes, Jim." He said as he pulled the plug in the tub, letting the water drain from around their ankles. Then turning on the shower feature, Khan began to rinse his back, though shuffled his feet a bit to trade places with Jim. 

Jim moved to stand under the shower and looped his arms around the back of Khan’s neck, fingers lacing together. He raised his eyes to look into his lover’s and smiled at him, one hand gently running through Khan’s hair. “You respond so well to being told I care for you,” he said. “I need to say it more often.” He lifted his mouth to kiss him tenderly and whispered, “I love you, Noonien.”

The words were golden to Khan. The phrase was not overly used between them, though constantly implied and shown through actions and other words. After all they had been through, separately and together, the two men had found friendship, companionship, trust, and love with one another. It was no small matter. "And I love you, Jim." Khan said, humming happily into his mouth as they kissed. 

The phrase was the best high Jim ever achieved, better than any drug or experience. He nuzzled against Khan’s right cheek as the kiss ended and whispered, “I want you to make love to me again, Noonien. I need your support. But let me wash you off first. You know, I love any excuse to touch all over your body.” He stepped back to look all over his beautiful lover, enjoying the view immensely. He never admired Khan purely for his appearance, no matter how beautiful he was, especially since it was manufactured. Double manufactured because of Marcus’ tampering, in fact. But his heart...that was all Khan’s.

"Yes Jim, you will have me." Khan promised. Making love to him had not left his mind. But for the moment, he savoured the way Jim touched him. The augment had spent much of his life remaining separate and apart, never indulging in much, even something as simple as a hug or a kiss had been rare in his lifetime. But with Jim, the contact was frequent, and much needed.

Raising his arms, Khan placed his hands in the space between his own shoulder blades, elbows pointing up and out. Standing like this, Khan stretched out his back and submitted himself to whatever scrubbing and washing Jim felt was necessary. He grinned at Jim through the water on his face, "And I love any excuse for you to do so."

Jim hummed slightly off key while he washed Khan’s every inch with soap, enjoying the warm smile on his face. “You always look so good when you smile, Noonien.” He disliked how seldom enough it was that Khan smiled. His lover deserved so much better than life had given him so far. Which was one of the reasons Jim worked so hard to let Khan know he was appreciated and loved. He knelt at Khan’s feet and carefully washed each leg, paying special attention to the strong muscles of his calves and thighs. This was another way of relaxing, channeling his energies into his lover. He found a kind of peaceful headspace there, even as he rose and washed Khan’s stomach, chest, shoulders and arms. “There, all clean now.”

Watching Jim's tremendous attention to detail, Khan softly groaned, relaxing in this state of half washing, half massage. Though the gesture of Jim going to his knees, even for an innocent reason, made Khan's erection swell back to life. Licking the water from his lips, Khan dropped his arms, wrapping them around Jim easily. "Good." He purred, kissing the side of his face as he reached forward to turn off the water. "Now ... to bed with you."

Jim’s eyes flicked to his lover’s cock and licked his lips once in appreciation. “I can see why you want to get to bed, Noonien. Dry me off? Or better yet, we can both dry each other off.” He angled his head in invitation for another kiss and smiled at him invitingly. Even as he did, he reached for one of their fluffy towels to wrap around them both. That would draw them even closer together, pressing their bodies close. “And let me just hold on to you again, too. My Noonien.”

"Yes, Jim. All night, if you want." Though the truth of it was, Khan was the one more likely to keep hold of Jim throughout the night. He was vigilant about Jim's comings and goings from the bed, even if his lover was only going to the bathroom or answering an important call. If Jim left the security of his arms, Khan wanted to know why. Even in a half conscious state of sleep.

Khan pressed several light kisses over Jim's face and down his neck as he held him close. His hands naturally found their way against his back, fingers working into the muscle along his spine, something between clinging and massaging. "My Jim."

“Aw man, that’s the best,” Jim sighed and leaned into Khan’s ministrations, allowing himself a few moments to just soak in the attention. Eventually, he joined in the efforts and began to rub the towel over Khan’s skin, as well, also trying to ease out tensions and knots from the strong form against his. 

“You’ve been so good to me, Noonien,” he said and kissed his chin. “So good that I’ve done badly by you in return. That stuff I heaped on you today...that’s a lot to take in at once. Are you alright, Noonien, after hearing all that?”

"You've done nothing wrong." Khan said, capturing Jim by the jaw, holding his head, to hold his gaze. But to keep Jim from mistaking it for an aggressive gesture, Khan then kissed Jim on the lips as he let go. "I am grateful that you told me, Jim." He said softly, not really wanting to talk much on the subject as it would risk putting Jim in a dark and upsetting place again. "I am honoured to be your confidant ... that you trust me with your pain, and your healing." 

“Thank you, Noonien, for giving me someone to tell, someone to trust,” Jim said and brushed his lips over Khan’s again. “You give me someone to hold on to and trust with everything dark and everything bright inside me. Never had that before you, Noonien. Please take me to bed now.” He lifted his arms to his lover, inviting him to carry Jim to the bed, if he wanted. 

"With pleasure." Khan lifted Jim up into his arms with ease. He pressed their noses together with a breath, then continued on to the bedroom. Laying Jim out on the firm, standard issue Starfleet mattress, Khan immediately positioned himself on the bed as well. On all fours, looming over his lover, Khan kissed him sweetly, letting his hips slowly drop, asking Jim for permission, asking him to part his thighs and let Khan in. Even though the augment already had Jim's consent several times over, this was still his way about it. 

Jim also enjoyed how careful Khan was with him, including making sure of his desire for sex. He carefully and slowly spread his legs to welcome Khan between them, also smiling seductively at his lover. “Yes, Noonien. Please.” He raised his arms to cup Khan’s face with his hands and arched up to meet his mouth. “A kiss for me, my Noonien? I do so love your kisses. They are the best I’ve ever had.”

"A hundred-thousand kisses for you, my Jim. Just tell me when you've had enough." Khan managed another smile before it was lost, his mouth devoted to kissing Jim and sucking playfully at his tongue. Now that he was resting comfortably between Jim's legs, Khan pressed and rolled his hips, letting Jim feel how hard he was against the inside of his thigh. "Mm- Jim. Always, so good." He said with a soft groan, rubbing against him more vigorously. 

“Oh, you’re so hard against me,” Jim murmured and arched his hips into the hard length, spreading his legs even more in invitation. “You have the lubricant handy, Noonien? Always need a lot to accept your lovely cock. So big and warm and long.” He hummed passion for his augment and stroked through his hair with care, before sliding a hand down his neck and back and over the slight curve of his ass. “I need you now.”

With a nod, Khan snaked his hand under the edge of the mattress. The two had come to hide small bottles of lubricant throughout the room, should the need arise. And sometimes there just wasn't time to go fetch it from a dresser or other defined area. With one hand, Khan popped the lid and poured a liberal amount over himself before tossing the bottle aside as he began to stroke himself, spreading the slick substance along the length of his cock to make things more comfortable for Jim. Then with a slow push, Khan pressed into his lover, groaning at the sweet sting of Jim's body taking him in. His mouth immediately moved to cover Jim's lips, half sucking and kissing as he kept letting himself sink in deeper.

Jim’s groan would have been much louder were it not for Khan’s mouth, sealing their lips together. He wrapped his legs around his lover and tilted his pelvis to allow for as deep a penetration as possible. He might have wished to have a hand in preparing Khan, but when his lover was so eager, who was Jim to complain?

When Khan full seated himself, Jim squeezed his legs even more around him. “Stay?” he whispered when he got a breath. “Stay inside me for awhile, Noonien? Want to savor you, filling me up so long and hard. Fuck. Like a burning brand inside me. Feels so good.”

"Yes, Jim." Khan continued to kiss him, whispering between a breath. "Happily." Smoothing his hands down Jim's sides and back around the underside of his ass, Khan helped support Jim in this position, keeping himself buried in his lover. He would give Jim everything he could, every time. "Sometimes I think you should just sit on my cock while you read a book and dictate your captain's log, since you like being kept so full." Khan said with a little grin. 

Jim’s eyes fluttered in pleasure at the notion, growing more dilated. “Fuck. I’d so totally do that, Noonien. Better yet, you could read to me, growl in my ear in your amazing voice while your cock was in me. I’d never last. I’d come all over myself.” He loosened his grip with his legs, but left them wrapped around Khan’s body. “Would you do that for me, Noonien?” 

"You like the idea?" Khan gave a delighted laugh, then proceeded to kiss Jim along the length of his neck. "Yes, I would love to do that for you, Jim." Then resting his head on Jim's shoulder, Khan let himself settle and remain still inside his lover, just as Jim had asked. He listened to the way he breathed and the beat of his heart and basked in the warmness of their two bodies pressed together in union. 

Jim rested that way, too, for as long as he could stand it, just enjoying the closeness. The only thing that would make it better was if they could join their minds, too. But he would never say such a thing to Khan. He knew Spock had attacked Khan’s mind so long ago after Jim had died. This was enough.

Finally, though, his purely mortal body needed movement and release, and Jim squirmed a little underneath his lover. “I don’t want to stop yet,” he whined at himself, but then arched up into his impalement. “Fuck. I need you to move now. I’m sorry, but I have to feel more.” He tightened his legs again and deliberately clamped his ass around Khan’s cock. “Please.”

"There is no need to be sorry, Jim. I will give you whatever you want." Khan said with another light kiss, this time to Jim's shoulder as he pushed himself up slightly. Then rolling his hips, Khan made his movements slow at first. With eyes half lidded, Khan purred darkly, enjoying the tightness Jim was deliberately giving him. "My Jim ..." He said, pushing his fingers into Jim's hair on either side of his head, then gently began to fist the short blond strands, his own eagerness starting to boil up to the surface. 

“Take what you want, too, Noonien,” Jim urged and tried to give Khan a tight, responsive channel to thrust into. He knew he wasn’t strong enough to take a fully unleashed augment, but wanted to give as much as he could to his lover. “Don’t hold back much,” he said and and groaned as Khan pulled slightly at his head. He wondered how many blondes Khan had known back when he ruled, how many blue-eyed lovers. But he was all Khan’s now, just as Khan seemed to be all his. 

Jim rocked into the powerful thrusts and used his legs to meet Khan with as much strength as he possibly could, too. The bed creaked ominously under them, but Jim knew it’s fortified joints would hold, since he’d taken care to get a new bed that would. And that was good for days when he needed to feel as much of Khan’s strength as the augment dared give him, when he threw himself all the way into their lovemaking. He could feel sweat beginning to trail down his skin now, as he used all of the muscles in his body to full effect. “Please, Noonien.”

In controlled increments, Khan showed a little more of his strength. Though he never pushed Jim more then he was willing to go. And sometimes that meant Jim was writhing and screaming and panting and scratching right along with him, and sometimes that meant a hand on his chest asking him to back off and be gentle with him again. Either way, Khan always listened to what Jim was asking for. Right now, he was fucking Jim into the bed, his pace steadily growing as he dove into his delicious ass, over and over again. "My Jim-" He said, fisting the hair on one side of his head as he kissed him on the mouth, seeking to claim all parts of him. 

Jim wanted the all of Khan tonight, so he was scrabbling at his back and shoulders and drumming a little with his heels, asking for more and more of the augment’s abilities. Even now, with the back of the bed banging into the wall and his thighs feeling abraded by the force of Khan moving between them, Jim wanted more. He opened his mouth to demand it, but found himself invaded by lips and teeth and tongue. Double pinned, he grabbed the back of Khan’s head and fought into the kiss, wanting to egg his lover on for even more. It wasn’t enough. Nothing would be enough until he felt and saw and tasted and thought of only Khan.

"Jim-" Khan growled out his name and nipped at his lips. His back curled in a very animalistic way as he thrust himself into his lover. One hand slid down the face of the young captain, thumb locked just under Jim's jaw. "You're mine. Say it." He demanded with another dark purr. Patches of his skin seemed to glow pink as his whole body was radiating with such heat. Small scratching surfacing here and there, making the augment all the more sensitive and excited. "Say it."

Jim groaned at the demand, both delighted and a little shaken by Khan’s dark tone. “I am!” he yelled. “Yours, Noonien! Please say you’re mine.” He whimpered at the end of it and then nipped at Khan’s cheeks, lips, chin and neck. His own responses to Khan’s thrusts became erratic, body spiraling out of control as his pleasure rose to new heights. He wanted to come badly, but not without Khan. 

Khan nearly demanded that Jim say it again, but the once had satisfied him. That was to say, his body stiffened up, joints going ridged and muscle turning to stone under his skin as he suddenly stopped. His face shifted, looking pained one moment, then relieved the next as he spilled his seed into his lover, coming in long hot waves. Though as the shuddering experience continued to tease his nerves, Khan gave in to a sharp gasp of air followed by a long moan. "Yes, Jim ..." He said after a breath, "I am yours."

Jim joined him in orgasm, untouched aside from the cock still releasing into his ass. He tightened his arms around his lover’s back and neck, before pressing his mouth to Khan’s face, all over. It was uncoordinated and messy, but all he could manage with his lover’s words swirling in his head and orgasm still thrumming in his veins. “Thank you, Noonien.” He felt wetness trickle out of his eyes and down his face, all the emotions of the day spilling over into tears he didn’t even try to fight now. They were the first he’d cried all day, though he’d held Noonien many times and shivered in his arms. 

Easing his tight grip, Khan allowed his body to relax, half slumping against Jim like a heavy blanket. Without any further words, Khan wrapped his arms around Jim and hugged him, as his friend and as the man who loved him. Then softly pressed his lips to his skin and began to kiss the beads of tears and sweat away. With one hand, Khan then reached back and grabbed one end of the nearby bedding and pulled it over both their bodies, creating a cave for them. It was here in this darkness, there was only room enough for the sight and sound of Khan and Jim, together. The rest of the world, the entire universe, was not welcome here. It was just for the two of them. 

This was exactly what Jim needed, a safe place to just feel and express everything without any kind of shame or fear. He tucked himself into the safety of Khan’s body and pressed his face into the curve of his neck. He pet at his lover’s chest and shoulders, before tucking his hands against his chest and just leaving them there. His eyes continued to leak, though, even as he sniffled a little. Finally, he drifted to sleep, eyes red and aching and still clinging to his lover.


	3. Revenge

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good grief. This took me forever to post.

Jim stood at the podium on Tarsus IV and presented his speech with squared shoulders and a straight spine. The ruins of the capital city loomed behind him, and he debated internally if he preferred not being able to see them or if he’d like them not to be at his back. Even among the mingled Starfleet personnel, dignitaries and press (not to mention Khan), he no longer felt safe. Admiral Tran had informed them before the ceremony began that two of the seven Tarsus survivors had been mysteriously killed in the last few months. And although it was possible that both of their deaths were accidents, the fact that two of the rarest people in the universe (as Tarsus survivors) had died so close to each other raised Starfleet’s red flags. They were proposing to put the other three not already members of Starfleet in protective custody.

That had further dampened an already somber reunion between them, although Jim had been so glad to see Billy (now William), Petrova and Michelle all grown up and healthy. But the spaces that should have been filled by Joseph and Zoe seemed all the emptier.

Jim was slightly amazed that Khan had let him continue to participate in the ceremony at all. His lover had gotten stiffer than ever at the news, every hackle raised and all senses on high(er) alert. Not that Jim could blame him- he felt like every hair on his neck and arms was raised straight up in alarm.

A chilly breeze blew over the back of that same neck, as he approached the closing remarks of his speech, all learned by heart and equally heart-felt. And then someone gasped and a few people yelled, the crowd all in motion all at once-

From his boots, to his tunic, to the ribbon holding back his hair, Khan wore all black to this grim occasion. And as such, he looked something of a menacing shadow as he stood just behind Kirk at all times. His head throbbed with every sound, every scent, and every sight before him, as Jim and the other Tarsus survivors had his keen mind focused on their protection.

And just as a Betazoid might be able to pick out an ecstatic mood in a gathering of mournful or thoughtful observers, Khan recognized a slight click that was out of place. It was not due to the nervous habits of someone sitting for long speeches, playing with something in their hands, or the shift of chairs as people tried to get comfortable or get a better viewing of events, nor was it the click of recording devices, the use of cameras or tablets. No, this was a weaponized click, and the instant Khan heard it, he tackled Jim to the ground, covering his body with his own.

Directly where Jim had been standing, an object landed with a dull thud and exploded, gas spilling out in all directions.

"Don't breathe," Khan ordered Jim, firmly slamming a hand to his chest, both knocking out the air already there, and planting an object on his tunic. "DON'T BREATHE!" he ordered the rest, who dove for cover an instant after he did. Then with a squeeze of the device in the palm of his hand, Jim, Khan, William, Petrova, and Michelle were beamed back to the Enterprise.

Biological weapons were nasty things. Especially the sort that got into your lungs and melted the sensitive tissue from the inside, out. With his hand still firmly on Jim, the protective augment seemed to fear that if he let him go, he might somehow still be taken away from him. "RED ALERT!" Khan yelled at the Starfleet personnel as they beamed into the transporter room. "I want Doctor McCoy and his emergency team, now! And connect me to Commander Spock!" He said, wanting to speak with him, since he was in charge of the Enterprise while Kirk was on site.

“This is Commander Spock,” Spock said with his normal stern efficiency. “Mr. Singh, I presume that an attack has been made on the captain. Please report your current status.” It was the only logical reason for such a call, especially as the augment generally avoided him at all cost.

For his part, Jim struggled against the hand over his mouth and pushed at Khan. He knew Khan had just saved his life, but he was more than a little worried about being literally smothered. Once his lover was in protective mode, it was damn hard to get him out of it.

Simultaneous to Spock's response, Dr. McCoy burst in, followed by a large medical team, which had been ready since before the event started, ready for trouble. They swarmed to the coughing Tarsus survivors, even as McCoy approached Khan and Jim. “Dammit man,” he yelled at the augment, “you need to let him go! I’ll take care of him!” He knelt and reached for Jim, tricorder already out and scanning. “Let the man breathe, damn you!”

"There was a gaseous, biological attack on the gathering. Kirk and the Tarsus survivors are in my custody." Khan answered, barely aware that the others were shouting at him. His mind was screaming with far more important matters. Though he did release Jim from his intense grasp, looking to McCoy several times over as if to ensure that it was in fact him and not some face changer in disguise. "I recommend a protective detail assigned to each of them. And not to allow any further transit to or from the Enterprise."

“Understood,” Commander Spock said. “We are in contact with the surface, who have confirmed the attack on the ceremony. Several attendees were injured in the attack. How is the Captain?”

“He’s fine,” Jim said, trying to shoo way Dr. McCoy, who was growling at him and trying to give him a hypospray. “Spock, coordinate with the Intrepid to put together away teams to find the attacker. And scan the damn vicinity! I want to know how the Hell anyone got here under Starfleet’s nose. This was supposed to be secure, especially since the death of the others! I’ll be ready in fifteen to lead one of the teams.”

“You damn well will not!” Dr. McCoy snapped. “I need to run a lot more tests on you, Jim, before we can be sure that poison isn’t hurting you.”

"You. Are. Not." Khan growled at the same time as Doctor McCoy. "You were the intended target, Jim. As were the others. You would not subject them to return to the planet to be preyed upon again. Nor shall I allow you to do so." Khan looked absolutely wild, just under the surface. There was a subtle strain to his voice that hinted at his anxiety and anger, and a sharpness to his eyes that suggested he had not yet taken the time to blink, but instead had taken in everything he had seen so far. If left unaddressed, Khan would easily work himself to fight anyone he perceived to attack Jim.

Jim angled to look at Khan and lifted his hands to frame Khan’s face. “It was an attack on my family, too. And I would never order them back, but I won’t be left out of the search for the one who tried to murder us, either. I am a Starfleet Captain, Noonien, not a civilian like they are…” He glanced away to check on his fellow survivors, grateful to see they looked unharmed except for fear and shock. “And Kevin is an engineer, so he stays aboard the Enterprise, too. Spock, you hear me...lock down the Enterprise like Khan said. And prepare those away teams. Let me know what the Interpid says about the attack, too…” He breathed out a low, angry noise. “There’s only one person who benefits from trying to have us killed. Kirk out.”

He turned back to Khan, still ignoring Dr. McCoy’s rant at his side, though he knew that wouldn’t be able to for much longer. “You saved all of our lives, Noonien. Thank you.” And he angled in to kiss his augment, hands still framing his face, trying to offer both gratitude, love and comfort with the touch.

Khan could barely think of kissing at a time like this. But Jim knew how to manipulate the augment, not in a cruel way, but to get him to ease. First, he had initiated contact, touching the sides of his face, speaking clearly to him and showing signs of his own health and wellbeing. That way Jim had his attention. Then his words were calm and introduced rational elements, which also helped. And finally, the kiss of thanks. The kiss, that allowed Khan to get an intimate sense of Jim's confidence and strength. He was alive. His brain could savour that at least. Jim was alive. Khan had done the right thing. But his own kiss was shy and still somewhat reserved, even though it was a small reassurance both men seemed to need.

Dr. McCoy makes an irritated noise behind them and says, “Jim, I still need to check you over more carefully. You did inhale a bit of that gas and whatever you may feel now, I need to ensure that there was no damage to your lungs.” He noted the rest of his medical team taking the other survivors to Sickbay. “Don’t make me make it an order, Captain.” His voice hardened considerably.

“Damn it, Bones,” Jim snapped, but then sighed and nodded in head once in acceptance. “I’ll be there in a minute.”

“Jim-”

“I promise, Bones,” Jim said sharply and then softened his features as he looked into his friend’s worried face. “Promise. I just need to talk to Khan for another minute, all right?”

The doctor paused and then said, “Mr. Singh, I trust you to make sure Jim gets the care he needs.”

"Yes, Doctor McCoy. Of course." Khan said, eyes darting to the side as he watched the other Tarsus survivors being taken away for further care. Even though everyone in the room was an ally, Khan was watchful of every movement in the room, prepared to read into the slightest deception that might signal another attack. But as the room began to clear, Jim had his full attention once more. "Are you alright, Jim?" he finally asked in his own time, hand coming to rest on the center of his lover's chest.

“No!” Jim said vehemently as the doors shut behind the medical staff and their patients. “He’s alive, Noonien! How the fuck can he be fucking alive?! They said-” his voice cracked on a mixture of anger and pain “-they said he was fucking dead! That his burned corpse was found outside the capitol building, killed during some of the last riots. But who else would be trying to finish what he started, Noonien? Who would consider us the last pieces of unfinished business? It has to be Kodos. Fucking Kodos.”

"Yes, Jim-" Khan pressed his hand a little more firmly over Jim's heart. "I have no doubt. Which is all the more reason why you should remain on the Enterprise. You survived him once, twice, after the attack of today. Do not press it, to survive him again." Khan wanted Jim nowhere near the planet and certainly nowhere near Kodos. "Jim...allow me to go on the away team in your place. Allow me to gather the facts and bring resolution to these events."

“You were never not going to be on the away team, Noonien,” Jim said and tangled their fingers over his heart. “But I didn’t run away when I was fourteen, and I’m not going to start running now. I’m not going to let Kodos continue to be the man in my nightmares. I came here to face my past...well, looks like Kodos wants me to go all the way.” He sighed and leaned their foreheads together. “But if you want a headstart, then I won’t stand in your way. Do you want a chance to hunt him down yourself, no chaperone, Noonien?”

Khan blinked. The following silence was eerie, almost as pure and dark as space itself. Khan never imagined that Jim would consent to him taking such action. But there was no other perfect time to unleash such a flawless warrior as Khan Noonien Singh. "Yes," he said, squeezing their fingers together. Yes, he wanted to move without restraint, he wanted to destroy Kodos and the threat he posed to Jim, his only family now.

“Listen to me, Noonien,” Jim said soothingly and pressed even closer to him. “You are the most important thing. Not Kodos. Not even the Enterprise. You. Don’t endanger your life with me in any way. I know you have to do what you have to do, but if I lose you-” He took a deep breath and kissed Khan deeply. “Even if you succeed, if I lose you, it’s not worth it. Do you understand me, Noonien?” He looked deeply into those pale blue eyes, searching.

There was pure blue flame in his eyes, but Khan would not show Jim his savage side, never again, only the zeal he had for being allowed to do this. But he understood Jim. endangering himself meant more then taking unnecessary risks. It meant not falling into a dark and malicious state that he could not return from. "Yes, Jim. I understand." He said, pressing the sides of their faces together.

“I love you, Noonien,” Jim said softly and then stood up, Khan’s hand still firmly in his. “Now, escort me to Sickbay like I know you want to and I’ll tell Spock on the way to let you have your head in this matter. He’ll understand. And then go get that son-of-a-bitch, Noonien. If Bones finishes with me before you finish with Kodos, nothing will stop me joining you. Not even you.”

"I love you, Jim." Khan said. There was a unspoken 'thank you' in the words. He nuzzled their faces together again, as if wanting to be sure he was thoroughly saturated with Jim's scent, and he with Khan's, while he was away. Then keeping their hands joined, Khan walked Jim out of the transporter room, taking the most efficient way back to the medical bay.

 

*            *            *

 

Fifty-five meters below the surface of Tarsus IV, emergency walkways still retained several inches of water from when the buildings far above had city-wide fires extinguished. Over the following days, months, and years, the water had trickled down and flooded the floors, like many of the inhabitants of the planet, unable to escape. A mix of black and red spores clung to the walls and ceilings, blacking out a few of the emergency lights that still ran after all these years. Solar panels and generators still doing their job after having been long forgotten.

Khan had made a systematic search of the other levels, but this one held certain promise of leading him to his prey. There was a subtle electricity in the air, signs that the air was being cleaned and purified somewhere near, making it fit for human respiration.

Kodos fumed in the main chambers of his hideout and cursed the strange man who had somehow reacted to the attack faster than he had even made it. All the months of planning since he had heard of this false ceremony to honor Tarsus IV’s dead wasted in the blink of an eye. His five targets, so conveniently brought like lambs to the slaughter, were now beyond his reach, and Starfleet was scouring the planet for him. But as before, he would simply wait them out in his undetectable bunker, safe from their meddling, and leave after they did. He would have to continue his hunt for the rest of those who needed to die individually, a tedious task, but he wouldn’t leave things undone. They were undeserving, especially the mongrel Kirk, the damned boy who had foiled Kodos’ perfect plans in the first place. How dare he survive!? He was the cause of all the failings on Tarsus! He picked up a piece of scrap metal and hurtled it across the chamber.

The clang of metal was unnatural here. This was not some old computer system warming up, shifting procedures as it attempted to continue carrying out its purpose. No, this was a sign of life. A life, that would come to an end very shortly. Khan picked up his pace until he found the room he was after. Like a caged animal that knew he was about to be released back into the wild, Khan placed his hand on the door and forced himself to take a good, deep breath. His entry would be swift, but killing Kodos was something he intended to draw out.

Opening the door, Khan let himself in, catching sight of the former Governor for the first time. And with a small scoff, Khan marvelled with disgust how a boring old man like this could be responsible for such sickening acts of humanity. Then again, Khan knew the monstrous and gruesome side of humanity all too well. "Kodos, then." He said, gauging the man as he stepped closer without fear. Instead, he was imagining the thousands of things he wanted to do to the man, and which should come first.

Kodos whirled toward the unexpected voice, a phaser already in his hand. He was extremely displeased at having been found, here where he should be safe. “Governor Kodos,” he said with a low growl of displeasure at the other man. This dark stranger was the one who had foiled his attack. But then he narrowed his eyes at the other man and said, “Oh. Oh, it’s you.” A bright spark lit his eyes, and he eased forward to stare at him unabashedly. “The augment. Khan Noonien Singh.” Here was everything Kodos believed in, wrapped up in one perfect package. “You must understand,” he said. “You must understand what I did and why. The better must be allowed to survive, no matter the cost to the weak. You believed the same, did the same.”

"Governor." Khan corrected his manners in mock respect for the title. "Where are your people then, Governor? Who is it you govern over, I wonder." Khan tilted his head, eyeing the man, then the weapon he held. If it was at its highest setting, it would kill a human being straight away, but Khan could still resist one, or two hits, as long as they were body shots and not directed at his head. The heart and other muscles would restart on their own, but the brain had delicate tissue and nerve endings that were more difficult to repair, even those as exceptional as his.

"Why must I understand? Do you feel you must explain yourself to someone, Kodos? Rationalize your decisions? How ... small of you." Then offering a false smile, Khan took two lightening fast leaps and pounced like the predator he was. With a single swipe, he fractured Kodos' wrist, knocking the phaser away, and with a flick of a claw-like hand around his throat, threw Kodos to the ground. "Now then-" he growled, "please continue. You were saying?"

Kodos didn’t even get off a shot before the augment was upon him, his wrist snapped and the weapon skittering away across the floor. And oh, Khan was amazing, all ridiculous speed and power and grace. He was perfect, everything humans should be. But his words…

“I do not need to explain myself to anyone,” Kodos said with a frown cradling his broken wrist and trying not to whimper with pain. “I did what needed to be done! Why didn’t those brats just die with the rest of them? Then everything would have gone all right. We had plans to bury them all. We could have taken care of everything ourselves. You must understand that...your people chose who needed to die so others could live.”

"My people?!" Khan's lip twitched with barely suppressed rage. "My people were guardians over humanity. Protectors, in a world of butchers looking for lambs to slaughter." But it was a common ignorance. Earth's history only reflected the Eugenics War as a bad thing, lumping all augments together as one villainous species. But the truth of it was, many countries had their own eugenics programs, engineering augments to be super-soldiers, or super-leaders. And within each program conflict of interests arose and some augments outgrew the mission they were originally designed for. Khan and his people however had served humanity as best as they could, until their last moments on Earth. But that was not how they were remembered.

"But for you, Kodos ... perhaps I shall play the role of executioner. You would like that, I think. Dying at the hands of an ideal you revere so deeply? How must it feel, to have your life be deemed unworthy?" Khan took Kodos by the hand and pinned it on the floor by his head so that he could hear each bone break, where he gave it another twist, cracking it so that it was completely severed, only held somewhat in place by his skin, which acted as little more then a plastic bag, holding the bones altogether, limp at the end of his forearm. "Now then, you were saying?"

This time, Kodos howled with pain and fear as the augment crippled his hand and tried to crawl away. But he was held fast by Khan and couldn’t move. “Why are you doing this? You are the one who stopped me before! What does it matter to you? You killed thousands of people in San Francisco when you crashed that spaceship there! What did their lives matter to you? What do these? Two of them are Starfleet personnel- Starfleet who betrayed you from the moment they awakened you. You should have been a god to them, but they used you! And instead, you’re a toadie to a pathetic little excuse for a bastard who ruined everything.”

"How friendly. You've been following my activities." Khan used his pointer finger and thumb to trace along the lines of the former governor's face. "Did you know, Kodos, if I were to stay peeling the skin from your face, that the human body can withstand about twenty minutes without sedative, before collapsing into shock? Twenty minutes, can you imagine. To feel the skin being pulled away from bone ... I wonder to what genetic advantage it is, that the human body would want to remain conscious for such torture." Khan let the idea sink in.

And oh, his lizard brain wanted him to do it. Rip apart this pathetic wretch of a man for daring to touch his Jim. For daring even to _think_ of touching him.

But the truth of it was, Jim wouldn't want Khan to behave so cold-bloodedly. Not for Kodos' sake, but for Khan's. "Twenty minutes of your screams, your blood, until your last breath. Or-" Khan stood, the heel of his boot coming to rest on Kodos' throat as Khan stood above him. "...your continued existence represents a threat to the well-being of society. And so, I sentence you to death." He said, grinding his heel down into the man's throat, crushing his windpipe, suffocating him painfully before the end. There would be nothing further drawn out about the death of Governor Kodos; he was unworthy of the special attention.

Once Kodos stopped struggling under him, and the heel of his boot began to grind against the spine at the back of his neck, Khan gave one more lurch of his weight, crushing and splintering the bone under foot. With a deep sigh that sounded more like a hungry growl, Khan just stood there, looking down at the man of Jim's nightmares. He would want to see the body for himself this time. Closure. Once and for all.

"Khan to Enterprise." He called out on his communicator, though was uncertain if the reinforced bunker would allow for a clear signal.

"Enterprise here," Uhura's voice said instantly. "Mr. Singh, I'm transferring you to the captain now." There was a quiet click and then Jim's voice was there- "Kh- Noonien, I'm glad to hear from you. I was just about to join you on Tarsus." He made a soft noise and said, "I guess I don't have to ask if you found Kodos...or if you had to kill him for attacking you. I need to see him. Your coordinates say you're well underground...I'll have to come to the surface. Meet me there?"

"Yes, Captain." Khan said by way of using his title to confirm that yes, Kodos had been found, and yes, he was dead now, and yes, he understood Jim's need to see for him. "The air quality is poor down here. You would require a respirator. I will bring his body to the surface, if that is acceptable." In a way, Khan did not want to risk leaving the body behind, in case it somehow managed to disappear in the minutes he was gone to the surface to meet up with Jim. After all, Kodos might not be working alone, and Khan did not want to promise Jim a body, only to have it taken from him.

"I'll bring a respirator, too," Jim said. "I want to see where you found him...and I imagine Starfleet will as well, once they realize that's where Kodos hid out. But yeah, bring him to the surface where I can see him." "As you wish, Jim." Khan positioned himself again over the body of Kodos. He could still see all the sadistic and vengeful things he might have indulged in, on behalf of those who died, and those who survived. But that side of Khan would have to remain buried. Jim was safe, that was the priority. As if on the same wavelength, Jim made a soft noise and asked, "Are you alright, Noonien? Are you still mine?”

"Yes." Khan said at last. "I am unharmed. I am still yours."

Jim shut his eyes and made a deep noise of relief. “I’ll be down to meet you in fifteen minutes, Noonien. Just be there.” He ended the communication, but only to finish changing into his more civilian clothes, not wanting to sully his captain’s garb with this. He wore all black, like his Noonien, and took a Starfleet issue respirator on the way. When he arrived at the coordinates, the first thing he did was look for his lover, his Noonien. “Noonien?”

"Yes. I am here." Khan said, pushing away from the step of a fire escape where he had been sitting, down a narrow alley. It was close to one of the nearby secret entrances, or in this case, exit from the underground labyrinth of bunkers. Standing at the mouth of the alley, Khan blocked the way slightly, wanting Jim to be certain of himself before seeing the body of Kodos in the dirt.

Jim headed for Khan with relief and threw his arms around his neck, holding him tight and pressing their foreheads together. He searched his lover’s eyes for a long moment and finding what he needed there, smiled gratefully. “Noonien. My Noonien. You took care of Kodos for me...and for yourself. But you’re still there, still with me.” He breathed out a warm sigh of relief.

"Yes, Jim." Khan answered, then in a rare gesture that held great implications, Khan pressed his nose into Jim's neck and hid his face there for a moment. "I am still yours." Khan had shown exceptional restraint, not because it had been commanded of him, but because it had been asked out of love. "Devotedly, yours." He said, then kissed Jim just below the ear. "Now, tell me what you need."

Jim took a deep breath and stroked the long, black hair of his lover, which was still neatly tied back, though the rest of his lover was feral somehow, wild in his protective urges toward Jim. “I need to see him, Khan. I need to be certain that he is dead and gone forever. After we’re done here, I’ll make sure that Starfleet is notified of Kodos’ death, if not your precise role.” He kissed Noonien again, opening his mouth to his lover.

With a single nod, Khan agreed to Jim's wishes. But as they kissed, Khan was all too hungry for his mouth, sucking on his tongue and humming or growling his pleasure at having Jim's taste on his lips again. He loved Jim and would do anything for him. Right now, Jim could command anything of his lover, and Khan would do it eagerly. But since this was not the time for kisses, Khan broke it off and stood aside, allowing Jim free access to the body Khan had dropped unceremoniously onto the ground.

Jim glanced over at the body and then slowly made his way to it, looking down into the face of the man who’d haunted his dreams for so long. He didn’t spare more than a glance at the broken (pulverized) neck, the obvious strength of the one who delivered the final blow, but concentrated on the face. “Yes,” he said finally, as if in a trance, “that’s Kodos. Funny, he looks so small somehow, but he’s had such a huge impact on so many lives. He’s gotten old...” He shut his eyes and balled his fists, shaking as he stood there over the Executioner...now executed himself. “How can this crummy old man have killed so many people?” he yelled and then turned away from the sight, returning to Khan to lean against.

And that was just it. Kodos was just a man, then and now. Representing that darker parts of humanity, just as Admiral Marcus had. Humans might have evolved their technology in the last three hundred years, but their darker natures still had yet to fully evolve. Men and women were still capable of being like Kodos or Marcus. Just as they were capable of being like Kirk or Pike. "I have not answers for you." Khan said, unable to console Jim in this way. "Jim ...?" Khan began to suggest an uncertain thought. "Would you like to talk to him? Yell at him? Tell him you are a survivor? Tell him, he was wrong?"

“I don’t know.” Jim admitted from the safety of Khan’s arms again and hazarded a glance over his shoulder. “He’s nothing anymore...just the corpse of a crazy old man. A piece of evidence from the past.” He sighed and pressed his face into Khan’s neck. “He wouldn’t have believed me anyway, would he? He came here to kill us, to finish the job, so he couldn’t have felt any remorse, any doubt that he did the wrong thing. To him, the fact that we survived just indicated that there was something wrong with the universe, an indication that weaklings sometimes survived.” He stepped back and looked into Khan’s eyes again. “Show me where you found him? I brought a respirator.”

"No." Khan growled softly. "He has been silenced. I do not want you to talk for him. I want you to fight back, once and for all. For yourself. For the others." But perhaps Jim wasn't ready to confront and be done with Kodos in this way. Yes, his body was dead. But Khan wanted him to be dead in Jim's mind as well, and he felt vocalizing everything he felt to Kodos as he was now, would be the best way. Though Khan would not force the idea, he wanted Jim to continue to feel safe in his arms and not pushed into something he was not ready to face

"This way."

Jim tugged at Khan’s arm, coming to a stop and staring at the other man a little. “You think I didn’t fight back against Kodos?” he asked, sparing another glance at the corpse. “You think I’m weak...the way he did?” He swallowed a bit of bile at the idea of Noonien thinking that way. “Maybe I used to wonder why I lived when others died, but I’m used to it by now, aren’t I- between my father, Kodos, Nero and well, you. Maybe I’m not better the way Kodos believed, but I guess I’ll do.” He raised his chin, eyes flashing defiance at the universe that kept trying to kill him off.

"That's not what I am saying at all, Jim." Khan was instantly wary of the way Jim was speaking. "I think you fought against Kodos every way you could, and that you have been fighting the imprint he left on you, everyday of your life. What I am suggesting, is that you fight him this one last time, and walk away satisfied that you have battled and defeated him, yourself." This was Khan's hard way about things, that did not always translate well between the two. Khan frowned, realizing now he should have just kept his mouth shut and allowed Jim to process in his own way without giving his own input on the situation.

Jim softened at Khan’s words and upset expression and stepped forward to lean into him again. He turned back to the corpse and just stared at it for a few moments, taking in the crumpled form of an old man lying huddled on the ground, a pathetic heap. “Bottom rail on the top now, old man,” he said with a slight smirk and then turned back to Khan. “I didn’t defeat him alone, now, did I?” he asked softly. “I needed some back up from my Noonien. And maybe, my Noonien needed it, too?”

Hesitantly pressing his hand flat against the center of Jim's chest, Khan looked into his amazing blue eyes, making certain the touch was allowed. He found it strange to see Jim out of uniform like this, all in black, like Khan, he did not belong to Starfleet just then. And for a flickering minute, Khan imagined a life without the rest of the universe so focused on their every move and every word. Where the two of them could just be themselves, and at peace. But the fantastical notion was out of place and had no business here, so Khan pushed it down, giving only a small nod in answer to Jim's statement.

Jim took Khan’s hand in one of his own and squeezed lightly at the strong fingers. He smiled at his lover, eyes bright now with his strong feelings for the man who had improved his life. “Thank you, Noonien. Let’s go see where Kodos the Executioner hid from us all, yeah? And then we can find a way for you to work off some of that extra energy.” He pressed their foreheads together again and said, “Please, take me to where you found him.”

"Yes, Jim." Khan began to lead the way again, but this time held onto Jim's hand for most of the way. There were false walls that provided narrow walkways between rooms on the surface, which lead down in a gradual slope to the entrance to one of the bunkers. The initial purpose, Khan theorized, was to provide shelter to the original settlers (and their valuable supplies) while they built the colony on the surface. But that only explained a few of the secure rooms, the rest had been designed and engineered much later. "You should put your respirator on, now." He said as they approached the pass-hole to the next lower level.

Jim paused long enough to put on his respirator and said, “Height of fashion, isn’t it,” to Khan with a warm smile despite the mask. “I don’t think anyone but Kodos and maybe his closest associates knew all of this was here. It explains how he was able to escape detection when Starfleet arrived right after the massacre and civil unrest.” He tightened his hold on Khan’s hand. “Did he say anything to you, before you took care of him?”

"Yes, I imagine Kodos allowed very few to get close to him, to know his plans. Though it would have taken a small crew, ten or more labourers to construct these rooms and passageways." Khan made a point to indicate several more rooms and passageways, describing where they lead to in the underground labyrinth. But after putting off the question, Khan finally answered. "Kodos expected that I should understanding his reasoning. He was shocked, I think, to realize I did not share his views."

“Well, eugenics was something he believed in, after all,” Jim said softly, “though I don’t think it manifested for everyone to see until after the colony was endangered. But certainly, he preached it to enough people to have followers to carry out his orders. They’re all dead or locked up though...and I think I finally believe that they’re all gone.” "I would expect Starfleet to have better screening policies regarding who they allow in such positions of power. It is a cultist's dream to have access to such a remote location and so many people under their rule to control." Khan said. A part of him would never quite trust Starfleet, seeing only where they failed, rather then where they succeeded. But Jim would have to forgive him for his point of view, it was an anger and resentment that would fade in time, even if it never left him entirely. Jim lifted his head, straightened his spine and said, “Tomorrow, we’re going to hold that ceremony, and I’m giving my speech. A slightly revised speech, but tomorrow, we’re finishing with Tarsus and then putting it in the rearview mirror forever. What do you say?”

"I look forward to your speech, Jim." As this time Khan would not have to be so high strung about any perceived threats. It was taken care of, now. "I hope that you can indeed put this place behind you, in a way you find satisfactory."

“Yeah, we can discuss the fuckuppery of Starfleet some other time, love,” Jim said with a little frown at Khan. He looked around the place and then nodded once. “All of my questions are answered, Noonien. All the mysteries solved. This only leaves the telling of them.” He squeezed Khan’s hand once. “Yeah. I think I can put it all behind me now, Noonien. All of the bad memories and nightmares. Though, I’ll want you there to make sure.”

"Yes, Jim." Khan said, turning to face Jim, then kissing the top of his hand. It was respectful and loving, but still quite reserved for the time being. "Are you sure you want Kodos on the Enterprise?" He asked, wondering if he might prefer one of the other nearby starships to take his body instead. Leaving the equipment behind, Khan knew several away teams would take evidence and record their findings as soon as Jim was finished here.

“No, I’m sending you back to the Enterprise and then calling the Intrepid and telling them Kodos is dead,” Jim said. “You’re not going to be involved in this at all, if I can help it. Spock and the others won’t tell on you. After all, he’s learned to bend a few rules from us now, hasn’t he?” He winked at the augment, feeling a little playful again.

Khan gave Jim a very firm look. "You are sending me back to the Enterprise." He repeated back, then continued in very simple sentences to make sure he was not misunderstanding. "You want me to leave? And you are going to stay here? By yourself? Without me?" Khan tilted his head, was he hearing this right. Jim did not want him at his side? And in the meantime, Spock would cover for them? Was he even capable of an outright lie? Deceit, yes ... but ... "That is what you want?"

Jim threw his arms around Noonien in a tight hug and looked into his eyes. “You say that as if you have no idea why I might want to protect you. My Noonien, you smashed Kodos’ neck...and it's pretty damn obvious someone of tremendous strength did it. Now, it’s my turn to stand up for you, alone, the way you did for me...alone. I’ll make the explanations and face the consequences. They won’t fucking dare punish a Tarsus survivor, the captain of the Enterprise, to boot, for killing Kodos the Executioner. But you...I don’t want them to have any chance at you, Noonien.”

Accepting the sudden hug, Khan wrapped both arms around Jim as well as he listened. Jim was protecting him. Not dismissing him. "I do not want you to be held responsible for my actions, Jim." It was all the better that Khan had not completely mutilated the body of Kodos, as that might have been a little more difficult to ignore. "If they seek to punish you, I will not be able to stand by in silence. I will speak out and confess."

“I’m sure I can talk my way out of anything serious,” Jim said and then looked at him with deep fondness. “You silly man, what did you think I meant about getting you back to the Enterprise?” He wanted to give him a kiss, but the stupid respirator was in the way. “Come on, let’s get out of here. But before I report this, do you have anymore energy you need to work out?”

What Khan thought no longer mattered, both men were trying to protect the other, and were simultaneously baffled when the other wouldn't let them. "As long as you feel safe, I will go." He said as they reached one of the upper levels, just before the surface. He plucked a finger lightly on the edge of Jim's respirator, indicating that he could take it off now. "With your permission, I will go to the officer's gym, to work out." He said, understanding himself well enough to recognize that it was not a good kind of energy that he had left over.

“Noonien, is that how you really want to work off your energy?” Jim asked. “If it is, of course you have permission to do so. If not...you could save some for me, Noonien. Indeed, I am going to want you again, as soon as I can have you.” He removed the respirator and then smoothed a hand through Khan’s long hair. “I still need you, Noonien. I always will.”

Dropping his head and closing his eyes slightly at the touch, Khan admitted, somewhat ashamed. "I would be unsafe for you right now, Jim." And he would never risk hurting Jim by letting loose on him while he still wanted to break and tear things apart with his bare hands. "But you still have me." He said, leaning his head into the touch a little further.

“You are sure, Noonien?” Jim asked, worried and somewhat angry at himself for putting Khan at risk. “I never meant to endanger your safety. I shouldn’t have asked you to do this for me.” He scowled at himself, full of self-reproach for putting Khan’s freedom at risk or filling him with the dark anger that encompassed too much of his life. “I’m so sorry, love. That was wrong of me.” He held Khan tighter and kissed his brow.

"You are keeping me from danger, Jim." Khan said quietly. "And had you not spoken to be beforehand ... had I come here on my own, without your knowledge, I would have burned off my energy, yes, but I would have changed in a way I do not think you would have liked. Now-" Khan palmed a hand over Jim's shoulder and down his arm, "once more, Jim. Will you be alright?"

“Noonien,” Jim whispered and grasped his hand, shivering a little at the implication of his words. “I’m well if you are. You are someone I could never afford to lose.” He kissed his nose and then his mouth. “Let’s get back to the surface. The sooner we can get your excess energy burned off and Kodos’ demise explained, the sooner we can be together.” He took Khan’s hand again and led him back to where they’d left Kodos’ body.

On the surface, Khan still was uncertain about leaving Jim alone with the body of Kodos. But he also knew that Jim wouldn't make the call to report his death until Khan was gone. "Soon, then." He kept their hands joined, and their eyes locked until Khan had been beamed back aboard the Enterprise. Now it was just a matter of working himself to exhaustion, then waiting for Jim to return to him.


	4. Relax

Jim waited for Khan to dematerialize and then called Starfleet. He saw the doubt in the eyes of the admirals when he explained away the death of Kodos, but as he predicted, they did not want to closely question one of the survivors of Tarsus. Especially not one who had been attacked again by the man, plus one of Starfleet’s heroes. So, they did not look as closely as they might at the incident. They were interested in the tunnels beneath the city, however, and planned to have them fully explored to flesh out the incident on Tarsus IV.

As for the ceremony, at the urging of Captain Kirk and with the support of the other survivors, that was rescheduled for the next day. He wanted to speak his peace and then leave forever. This time, he truly was ready to be done with the place. Thanks in part to his Noonien.

 

*            *            *

 

Once more, Khan stood at Jim's side. And while he still keenly paid attention to the crowd at the remaining events of the ceremony, he did not feel as anxious about Jim's safety this time. Instead, he could focus on Jim's emotional wellbeing and be certain that he did not get overwhelmed with people trying to talk with him about a subject he no longer wished to discuss. So, as events came to an end, and guests began walking off on their own to explore a few of the ruins for themselves as a way to let what happened sink in, Khan placed a hand against Jim's lower back, a gentle reminder that he was still there.

Jim navigated the ceremony like he did any other diplomatic function and was relieved to find that he found it as trying as he normally did- no more and no less. Khan kept the worst people at bay, merely with his presence and no nonsense glaring at anyone who got too personal. And Jim leaned into his hand gratefully to let him know that he appreciated all of the support.

As soon as he reasonably could, however, Jim signaled to Khan that he wanted to go home, back to the Enterprise. They had given the time to Starfleet, as duty required, and now it was time for them. Time for them to reconnect.

As soon as Khan recognized the silent signal that Jim was done, he positioned himself in front of the young Captain. He blocked off access to him from anyone else who might want a word or another second of his time. They were done here. Done with Tarsus IV. And so Khan held Jim's gaze, not wanting the place to intrude into his mind any further as he made contact with the transporter room to return them to the Enterprise.

Once on the familiar platform again, Khan stepped down first, beckoning Jim to follow with a casually offered hand.

Jim raised both eyebrows and then took Khan’s hand with his own. “Thank you again for standing by me throughout that ordeal. I thought the Edosian ambassador was particularly obnoxious today. I don’t know what it is with her, but I swear she’s flirting. I have to say, even if I was free and despite my penchance for trying anything...the dog-like legs are a total turnoff.” He stepped up and bumped against Khan lightly. “If I had any interest in anyone anymore besides you. So, where are you taking me?”

Khan listened to Jim's babble with quiet amusement. Sometimes he wondered if Jim was a nervous talker, in the sense that he rather talk then leave things in silence, isolated with his own thoughts. But if he was, or wasn't, it did not matter to Khan either way. As he would always listen, whether it was intelligent and creative conversation or a strange ramble of stream of conscious. "I am taking you back to our quarters, Jim. So that you might shed yourself of this formal attire ... and share a private meal with me."

“I can’t wait for both of those things,” Jim said. “And one final washing off of the dust from that fucking planet. Never again, Noonien. I swear, I never want to think of that place again, if I can help it.” He blew out a long breath. “There’s just one more thing sort of connected, that we’re going to have face soon…my mother. She couldn’t make this clusterfuck, thankfully, but it’s twinged her conscience again, so she wants to see me.” He groaned a little and took the lead from Khan. “Which means you’re going to have to deal with a night or two of me getting completely shitfaced...just warning you now.”

"What do you mean, your mother?" Khan glared, not at Jim, but at a spot just ahead of them as if the women in question was already standing before them. "What does she want from you?" Except for giving birth to Jim, she had no connection to him whatsoever, as far as Khan could tell. Their relationship was non-existent, and Khan felt it should remain that way. But it was Jim's choice, of course.

“I told you, her conscience is all in a knot again about stranding little Jimmy on Tarsus in the first place, so, she wants to pay her annual respects,” Jim said. “It’s usually a few day affair, full of recriminations, drinking and awkward silences. It’ll be awesome…” He paused and blinked a few times, thinking of adding Khan to that mix and said, “Oh fuck, this time round will be even better. I’ve never had a boyfriend to introduce to her before. And certainly she’ll have a mouthful to say about you, have no doubt.”

"I see. So she wants to feel better about herself, without accepting any of the reasonability, or mending any of the wounds. A type of egomaniacal martyr complex ..." Khan grumbled to himself for several minutes before realizing his comments were perhaps unfair to Jim. "Would it be better if I was not around, for her visit?" he asked, not wishing to add to a stressful situation.

Jim barked a soft laugh and turned into Khan’s arms for a hug. “You don’t have to meet her, if you don’t want, Noonien, but I’ll be proud to introduce you as my lover. My strong other half.” His mouth lifted in that cocky grin. “My better half.” He nuzzled into Khan’s right cheek and then just leaned into him with a sigh. “She’ll blow up like a volcano, but this time, I’ll have somebody at my side to help with some of the fallout. You know I always want you with me.”

Khan took it as quite the compliment that Jim would want to introduce him as, anything. "As long as you want me as your side, Jim, I will be there." Khan said, soaking in his closeness with a slight sigh of his own. His eyes flickered close, but would instantly focus on a passing crewmen in the hallway, prepared to address any criticism on their lips regarding the ship's captain and Khan like this.

Jim released him after a few moments and headed down the hallway again. “Anyway sorry for raining on our parade there. But it’s best to be prepared for these kinds of things...and I really had forgotten about it, mostly, until just that moment. What with everything else going on, a visit by my mother got to be secondary. Wow, that’s something I actually have to thank Kodos for.” He snorted and stepped into a turbolift.

"And it can continue to be secondary." Khan said, listening to the hum of the turbo lift as it navigated each floor, until they reached their level. "No more mothers, no more Kodos, no more Tarsus IV, and most importantly, no more uniforms," Khan said with a little smirk, watching Jim out of the corner of his eye as the walked down the hallway.

Jim made an excited noise and picked up speed, jogging toward his quarters now. “Just wait until we get inside, Noonien,” he called. “A little bit of making out the crew doesn’t mind, but if we start fucking in the halls, they might get a little upset at me.” He was practically running all out now, eyes laughing as he ran, aware of how easily Noonien kept right on his heels.

Under alternate circumstances, for instance, if they were in the gym, or a part of an away team mission, Khan would have tackled Jim to the ground, wrestling him until he surrendered. But such play was not meant for the hallways of the Enterprise. So instead, he kept just behind him, using his finger to poke Jim in the side, to distract him and make him laugh. "In a rush, Jim? Eager, are you?"

“Oh no,” Jim called back over his shoulder. “Not at all, Noonien. I’m just running to try and get away.” He sped up a step more, faster now than he had ever been. Playing, exercising, sparring and having sex with his augmented lover had put him in the best shape of his life. That was one point Bones had to give his new relationship. He arrived at his quarters and came to a skidding halt to key in his code and then dart inside. He tore and kicked off clothes on his way to the shower, wanting to be rid of the last traces of Tarsus.

With a firm smack to the wall, Khan locked the door to all other personnel before proceeding to give chase after Jim. Stripping down, his own clothes fell just over Jim's items on the floor, gold and green in contrast with black and grey. Khan reached out, and grabbed Jim by the hip, as his other arm hooked around his middle, pulling him back into his arms. He gave a happy groan at the sudden warmth of both their bodies pressed together. "Looks like I got hold of you after all."

Jim laughed as Khan scooped him up and molded himself contentedly against the augment, one arm going back and around Khan’s neck. “Mmm, I don’t mind being caught by you.” He twisted his head to nip and kiss at whatever bits of skin he could find. “In fact, I’ve been looking forward to it all day. Well, since I finished my speech anyway. That was important to me.” He relaxed into Khan’s arms and pressed his face into the curve of his jawline.

Khan nodded slightly, but didn't say anything. Instead, he kissed Jim on his shoulder, then shuffling both their feet forward, reached with one hand to turn on the shower. As it immediately came up to temperature, Khan then released Jim completely, encouraging him to get in first, while he followed. "What, specifically?" he asked, even though he already knew. He asked, because he liked how vocal Jim was, how easy it was for him to ask for the things he wanted, and how often the things he wanted was Khan. "Scrubbing you down? Perhaps you feel you've earned a massage? Or are you looking to be pressed against the wall...with the water drowning out your moans?"

“I vote for all of the above,” Jim said eagerly and turned toward Khan. “I really do want every last trace of Tarsus scrubbed off my body to start. I don’t want to have anything remaining on me when you fuck into me and make me moan louder than even the water can cover.” He put his hands on Khan and rubbed up and down his strong chest, pinching at his nipples. “And I want to wash all the crap of Tarsus off you, too. Leave it all behind us.”

"Yes, Jim." Khan agreed, glancing down with a little smile as Jim pinched his skin. He stepped into the touch with a soft hum, kissing Jim on the side of his neck. "I'll start from the top, so as we go, everything will wash down and away." He said, reaching for the biodegradable shampoo that was common on Earth, but mandatory on starships and space stations. Then with a pool of the substance in the palm of his hand, Khan began to work it into Jim's short hair, making a thick lather as he worked his fingers against his scalp.

Jim adored when Khan became attentive and luxuriated in the simple pleasure of being bathed by someone who loved him. He allowed his body to be moved this way and that to facilitate the removal of all of the hateful dust and dirt and grit of Tarsus, imagining all the foul memories sluicing off and down the drain, as well. And Khan’s hands missed no part of him, so that he knew that not a trace would remain once they were done.

His libido did not stay unstirred by the tender devotions, either, as his senses were invaded by all things Khan. The more the augment scrubbed and washed, the heavier Jim’s cock became between his legs and the achier his balls felt. By the time Khan finished, he knew he would be leaking in a way that would have been embarrassing in front of any other.

For that very reason, Khan had kept his cheek pressed close to Jim's thigh while on his knees, just finishing off cleaning between his toes and under the arch of his foot. "My love, I think there is one more thing you should have expunged from your body ..." Khan said, smiling a little as the shower water washed over his own face and down his back. He blinked some of the water from his eyelashes as he looked up, allowing his lips to drift closer to Jim's erection. "Now, would you like to come on my face by your own hands, or shall I assist you?"

“Oh, fuck,” Jim said and had to grip himself not to just come right then and there at the damn words. “Will you talk to me while I jerk myself off, Noonien? I don’t even need to touch myself. You could just talk me into coming all over myself and you. Just by telling me to. Just by being down there, at my feet, looking so fucking sexy and powerful.” He grasped his cock harder, a little worried he might talk himself into orgasm.

"Yes, Jim. It would be my pleasure." Khan said, nuzzling the side of his face against Jim's thigh, but in such a way that kept his eyes up towards his lover, and his lips just barely parted for him. "You know Jim ... as much as you are mine ... I am yours as well." Khan said, licking his lips before he offered Jim an easy smile. "Sometimes, I want to be reminded that I am your Noonien ..." Khan lightly placed his hands on Jim's hips, but was gentle and cautious with his touch, as he did not want to interfere with Jim's progress. "I want to watch you touch yourself, I want to hear and see you bring yourself pleasure as you come against my face ... to mark me as your own, Jim ... please ..."

“Fuck, yes,” Jim panted and began to stroke himself, hoping he would last more than a few moments. “I love marking you as mine, Noonien, as much as I love how you mark me. It’s so fucking amazing that you care for me so much. Makes me so hot. I’m gonna fucking explode all over.” He whined in the back of his throat, hand working faster on his length and twisting at the head. The idea of Khan wanting to be marked, wanting to be his, that’s what pushed Jim over the edge. His hips jerked in a helpless series of thrusts, as he splattered all over Khan’s face, the floor and himself. And he called Noonien’s name with every breath expelled from his lungs.

As he watched Jim push himself closer, Khan leaned in, whispering, "Yes ... please, Jim ... yes ... I'm yours ... yes, I'm yours ..." Then he eyelids lightly fell closed as Jim came across his face, marking him with his seed. But he made no move to wipe it off, or lick it off his lips and swallow. Instead, he just sat there with a warm purr settled deep in his chest, satisfied that he belonged to Jim, that his lover had claimed him in this way.

Jim’s legs gave way below him, and he found himself on his knees beside Khan. He reached out to touch Khan’s body, starting with his face and then down his chest, stroking the soft skin and spreading around the mess. His cock, newly spent, nonetheless made a valiant effort to harden again at the sight of Khan so claimed. But the words murmured by his lover also nearly broke his heart, and he wrapped himself around his lover in a tight hug. “And I’m yours, Noonien. We belong to each other. Never going to be parted willingly. You hear me?”

It meant a great deal to Khan, to both of them, for their individual reasons, that one would not abandon the other. To share good days and bad ones, they would be there for the other. "Yes, Jim." Instead of fighting it by trying to show some sense of dominance again, Khan allowed the hug. In fact, he submitted to it completely as he leaned against Jim and his loving embrace. "Thank you." Jim wouldn't leave him. They were family. The right kind of family, unselfish and unconditional in their love for the other.

Jim understood how hurt Khan still was by the loss, the rejection, of his own people and always did his best to try and bolster his lover’s need for family by being there himself. It wasn’t enough, he knew he could never be enough, but he tried with everything in him. “Now, let me wash you off, Noonien? And then we can go to our bed and you can cover me in your scent and you in mine.”

"Yes, I would like that very much." Khan said. Though Khan was proving a bit difficult to spring into action now, sitting as they were, on their knees, hugging, with the water raining down on top of them. He was feeling satisfied. More then that, he was happy, even if it didn't show in the more traditional ways. But he was very happy, trusting in the way Jim both touched and spoke with him. He had a place here with Jim, a home. A life that wasn't simply about existing, surviving, day to day. Jim needed him. Needed his possessiveness, his protection, his grounded way of thinking, his passion, and his patience.

With a deep sigh, Khan sat up a little straighter, then stood, pulling Jim along with him. "I don't want to contaminate you, by holding you ... but I want you in my arms ..."

“Contaminate me? Never.” Jim tucked himself tighter into Khan’s grasp and slotted his head so it fit comfortably under his lover’s chin. “Hold me for however long you want and need, Noonien,” he said. “I’m content to stand here all night if that’s what you want.” And he was, especially since he found being tight in Khan’s arms as awesome as his lover did. He hadn’t had a lot of experience with merely being close to someone else before the augment. “I love you, Noonien.”

"Yes-" Khan whispered into his clean hair with a little smile that had yet to fade away. If it weren't for Jim's duties as captain, Khan would have kept him in his arms for hours on end if he could. In bed, sleeping or talking. Or on an observation deck, watching stars and planets slowly shift by their line of sigh. He would hold Jim for all time, if he could. There was always a strong, bonded feeling to it, having their bodies pressed together, hearts thumping in their chests for the other to feel. The more romantic, creative side of Khan sometimes wished that their bodes could absorb the other, so that Khan could always carry a bit of Jim with him, and Jim, always carry a bit of Khan. But in place of that, the two made love and covered each other in sweat and kisses and other imprints that they could carry with them. "Just a little while more, Jim," he said, fingers lightly petting the small curve of his back.

“I said however long you like, and I meant it,” Jim assured with a lazy smile for Noonien, which was hidden in the curve of his shoulder. He stroked the augment’s strong back with gentle fingers, trying to impart no little care for him through these simple touches. He always found they worked best with his lover, even more than his oftimes fumbling words. Besides, he’d always been a large believer in actions.

They stood there long enough for his body to truly quicken again, given how tightly they were pressed together. Khan’s impressive length was hot against his skin, and Jim finally couldn’t resist the urge to rub against it teasingly. Maybe more than teasingly.

If he let his guard down, as he was now, Khan was quite sensitive to gentle touches like these. The nerves just under his skin jumped and his back arched under the touch. "I love you," he said, pulling his head back a little so that he could kiss his lover on his forehead, then to his temple, nuzzling and encouraging him to lift his head up so that he could kiss his lips. "My Jim," he added, hips rolling forward as well so that their cocks would slide and rub against one another, lubricated by the warm shower water. "I think the bed is a more suitable place for us to continue ... what do you think?"

“Do I get to wash you, Noonien, as you've washed me?” Jim asked. “Or would you prefer that we move on from the shower?” He continued to stroke the planes of Khan’s back, the curve of his shoulderblades. He felt his lover’s response, the way the augment wanted his touch and pressed into it. “I am completely enamoured of either situation; after all, I get to touch you all over no matter what way we do it.” He nipped playfully at Khan’s nose.

"If you insist." Khan pretended to growl at the bite, which was nothing more than him bearing his teeth in an exaggerated way, then proceeding to give Jim little nudges in the side with his fingers. "Wash everything off me, Jim ... leave only imprints of your fingers and your mouth," he said, resting his hands now on Jim's hips, acting as a belt that kept them pressed together as he slowly thrust against Jim's groin so that they could continue to rub against the other in the meantime.

“Hmm.” Jim considered his options and just managed to lean back enough to snag some soap for Khan’s back, ass and arms. He couldn’t reach much more from his current position, but made no move to free himself of it, either. Instead, he rinsed off his hands and went for the shampoo for Khan’s hair. This he worked in to a fine lather, taking care to get all of the long mane, each lovely dark strand. “You’re so fucking sexy with your hair long like this. I’m sad you tie it back everyday. I guess you have to, but still,” He trailed his fingers again through the length.

Khan rolled his head under Jim's fingers as the soapy lather was worked through his long hair. "In private, how would you prefer to see it?" Khan asked, then lulled his head back under the showerhead so that it might rinse faster. He appreciated a good wash, but he was looking forward to having Jim in bed.

Jim helped him rinse it out. “In private, I’d love to see it down more,” he admitted. “But I know that may not be as comfortable for you. I wouldn’t mind if you grew it out even longer than it is now, too. I’ve always liked lovers with long hair, and you look especially delicious with it long. One advantage of your not being so strictly under Starfleet rules. There, all clean.” He turned off the water and smiled at Khan. “Let me finish the rest of you?” Jim pulled a little against Khan’s very tight hold.

"I will consider leaving it down more often, for you. And I will continue to grow it out, until it becomes a burdensome length." Though even in such a case, Khan could wear it up full time as a way of managing it in public, but in his heart he was not quite that comfortable with putting himself at a tactical disadvantage in favour of something that was aesthetically pleasing. Not yet, anyway. "Finish the rest of me?" Khan asked, curious as to what he meant. Easing his hold as Jim pulled away, Khan at least kept the flat of his hand against his lover's skin at all times.

“Your legs,” Jim said and then knelt to take care of washing off the powerful limbs, right down to each toe. “You really are a beast. Musclewise, I mean. You make me feel completely inadequate everytime I see you up close.” He rinsed off the soap and kissed the knob of a knee. “But then I realize that your knees are as funny looking as anyone’s, and I don’t mind so much.” He rinsed off the rest of the soap, humming tunelessly to himself as he did. “There.”

Khan gave a short scoff. How could his knees be funny looking? They fulfilled their function. "Hm." Khan glanced down at Jim, skeptical. "I would tell you not to look too closely, but I rather enjoy your eyes on me." Watching Jim rinse him off, Khan shifted his weight from one foot to the other as needed, and even smiled a little as Jim took the time to clean his feet.

Jim laughed at Khan’s expression, which always portrayed annoyance so very well. “I love you, Noonien. Especially your sense of humor.” He stood up and kissed Khan’s nose with a wet smack. “Now, let’s get dry and go to bed. For a long time. In fact, maybe we’ll just skip tomorrow. Play hooky What do you think?”

"Yes, Jim. I think that might be manageable." Khan stepped out first, wrapping a towel around his hips before looping another towel around Jim's shoulders, where he began to pat dry his neck and work his way down. "We will receive a delivery from the kitchen at 2200-" Khan began, giving an itinerary of events he had planned for them that evening. "-which should allow us to remain in your chambers for at least a twelve hour period, without needing to venture out for substance. During which time we can make love as often as you like, find rest in each others arms, cuddle by the window and watch the passing galaxy before us...anything, but have you leave in uniform or answer calls."

“You know how to make a fellow’s day,” Jim said and stretched under Khan’s drying. “Hmm, let’s take some time before our food comes to just make out for a bit. I fucking love doing that with you, Noonien. Especially when you get all aggressive and just pin me down and kiss me stupid.” He leaned in to press his forehead briefly to his lover’s. “You’re feeling better, too?” he asked. “No residual effects?”

"Yes. I am well." Khan said, nuzzling their faces together. Washing was all well and good, but Khan wanted to ensure that they still smelled like one another. It was always a delight, even when Khan remained behind and Jim was on the bridge, being able to smell Jim's presence on his shirt or against his skin. It made the time on his own, minutes or hours, less lonely.

Dropping the towel from Jim's shoulders to his hips, Khan gently tugged him along, walking backwards as he led them back to the bed. "Come along then, my Jim."

Jim followed eagerly and watched as Khan easily navigated the room without looking where he was going. “Eyes in the back of your head, too,” he teased with a grin. He glanced at the bed they were heading for and felt even more residual tension seeping out of him. A few hours nestled in the strong, protective arms of his lover would do wonders.

“I’m glad you’re feeling better, too,” he said. “I was worried about you. Worried I may have done the wrong thing and endangered you, which I never want to do.” He stepped forward to crowd against Khan as they reached the edge of the mattress.

Sitting back on the edge of the mattress, Khan looked up at Jim with a soft curl of his lips. "Thank you." It was so unlike anything Khan had experienced before, but in his time with Captain James T. Kirk, he had discovered a companion and friend that did not expect him to take every hit, and in fact, did not want the augment to endanger himself, simply because he could withstand it.

Kissing the flat of Jim's stomach, Khan kept a tight grip on the towel around his lover's hips, not letting him escape quite yet. It was humbling, knowing that Jim was the only one left in the universe that would worry over him, love him, protect him. Khan was grateful to have Jim express such devotion to him. And so in turn, Khan wanted to do the same. His lips were gentle over the skin pulled tight across his ribs, and Khan smiled a little more freely. "What sort of things do you want?"

Jim slid his hands into Khan’s hair and stroked through the long, dark strands with gentle care. He leaned over to kiss the top of his lover’s head and said, “What don’t I want? You always make me happy, no matter what we may do. And leave me wanting more, too.” He did not rush the moment after that, though, as he continued to just hold on and caress the soft locks. Finally, he murmured, “I’d like to just lay together and let things build slowly. May we do that, Noonien?”

"Yes, Jim. Of course." Khan said warmly. Moving further back, the towel from Khan's hips naturally fell away, though he pulled at some of the blankets to offer as a light covering of their bodies. "What I meant, actually-" He began again after Jim was settled next to him. "-what sort of things do you want for me? For us?" He licked his lips, then added, "If that is acceptable to ask."

Jim climbed onto the bed, stretched himself out next to Khan and snuggled up close to the augment, placing a hand on his shoulder. “So many things, Noonien. But I know what I want foremost for you- happiness and peace. You haven’t had enough of either in your life, and I want to make up for that as much as I can. I’d like to be able to protect you, too, as much as I can. You’ve always been the one called upon to protect everyone else...I’d like for you to have someone else to rely on.”

He paused to kiss Khan’s lips softly. “For us...for us, I want a lifetime together, exploring the universe for as long as we may and then retiring somewhere quiet, with no worries but each other. Does that sounds stupid? Crazy?” Pressing a kiss to Khan’s right shoulder, he asked, “What would you like?”

Khan listened with attentive interest. Peace and happiness. Jim was right, they had not been present in much of Khan's life, but he was starting to understand their importance. Some days he caught himself being paranoid, suspicious, jumpy, anxious ... because there was no threat, nothing to fight against, and it was strange to just exist in a peaceful moment. But he was learning; with Jim, he was learning this lesson quite well.

"I like the sound of that, Jim." Khan shifted a little so that he could wrap his arms around Jim and hold him as they spoke. "Though I cannot imagine you retired...inactive. You wouldn't stand for it." Khan offered the comment with a smile. "But regardless of where the universe takes you, Jim, I wish to be at your side. I hope to remain a part of your life."

“I won’t willingly let you go, Noonien,” Jim said and kissed his neck sweetly. “Yes, it is difficult to imagine being retired, but someday, I might want to find a quiet place for it to be just us. At least, somewhere we can go when we want a rest. But I’ll always love exploring the stars...I don’t think that will ever change. And I’ll always want you to explore with, too.” He lightly pinched Khan’s side and thumbed over his right nipple. “Do you think you can find happiness with me, Noonien? No matter where we might end up?”

"Yes, Jim. I am confident that we will keep each other's lives very interesting and very happy." Khan leaned forward to kiss Jim, then rolled both their bodies, once, so that Jim was on this back, then once more, so that Khan lay out under him. Grinning and stretching out his arms over his head in mock surrender, Khan squirmed and jumped under Jim every time his fingers played over his sensitive body. Then abruptly, after a few minutes of this sort of play, Khan grabbed hold of Jim's wrists to hold his hands still a moment so that he could speak. "When our meal is delivered, I have a specific way I would like for us to dine, if that is agreeable to you?"

Jim’s eyes lit up, as they always did when he discovered that Khan had some sort of plans for them. “I’m always interested in seeing what you’ve thought up, Noonien.” He didn’t struggle against the hold, but relaxed completely. “Do I get to ask or are you going to surprise me with what you’ve thought up?” He was trying to think of all the special ways Khan might mean, unable not to speculate, at least internally, when presented with such a fun idea. “Maybe you could just hint?”

"No hints. No clues. Just surprise," Khan said, guiding both of Jim's hands above his head on the bed, where he gave a gentle squeeze. Bringing their faces together like this, Khan offered a few sweet kisses before relaxing his hold. His own hands dropped away to either side of his head, hair fanned out against the mattress, just at his own fingertips.

Jim found himself sprawled over Khan, legs on either side of his narrow hips, ass on an impressively six-packed abdomen, and hands resting on a strong chest. “Why, hello there,” he said with a warm grin and propped himself up a little to just look over his lover. He reached out with one hand, resting more weight back on his legs and ass, and stroked the fan of hair. “Aren’t you the best thing I’ve ever seen?” he murmured. “When did I get so lucky?”

With a little sigh, he said, “I’ve decided to ask for some shore leave for myself and the crew after the next mission. So, what kind of vacation shall we take? Something active and potentially dangerous or something restful?”

"Yes, Jim. You deserve it. All of you." Khan reached down and rested his hands on Jim's sides, smoothing his fingers down the arch of his back. "You need a rest. You get plenty of danger while on missions for Starfleet. You need something truly restful...if you can stand it."

Jim sighed a little and said, “I know you’re right, Noonien. I don’t like it, but I know I need to get some rest. Maybe you can help me research some places we can take the Enterprise for a nice week or so of relaxation? What kind of place would you like- beaches? mountains? desert? tropical? There’s everything you can imagine out there, just waiting for us to visit.” He contemplated his lover for a moment. “Have you ever taken a vacation before you met me?”

"A vacation?" Khan attempted to translate the word into his head into anything that might make sense. A vacation was time spent not working. A holiday. A break. An act of leisure. "No..." he answered cautiously, not wanting to upset Jim. Sometimes his answers were not human enough, sometimes his answers made Jim sad. "Not as such." And though there was a pause in his voice, there was no such hesitation in his actions as he continued to pet his hand over Jim's skin, savouring these sorts of small pleasures. "All of those environments sound ideal to me, Jim." Then for a moment, Khan considered asking Jim if he had ever traveled to India, Mongolia, China, or Iran...all places Khan considered home. Had considered his home. It wasn't now. It hadn't been for a long time. Earth had changed, and the landscapes he remembered, had been altered. To ask Jim if he knew these places didn't matter, the way Khan had experienced them three hundred years ago was much different then the way they were experienced in modern times. "I want no cities ... just landscape."

“Fat lot of help you are in narrowing my initial choices,” Jim teased and beamed at Khan. “Well, we’ll call this your first official vacation then. I’ll try to make sure that we both get some rest and fun in.” He stroked Khan’s chest as he thought, idly tracing the fine pectoral muscles. “Tomorrow, we can look over all the planet options and pick a few that sound fun for further investigation, what do you say?”

"Yes, Jim. If you like. Though your crew many want a say in this choice as well." Khan mentioned fairly. He would never be Starfleet, never one of the crew, but Khan was coming to appreciate Jim's people, and consider them to care and regard, in his own way. Some more then others, but that was the way of it.

As the door chimed and one of the cooks paged Kirk through the intercom on the wall, Khan suddenly wrestled Jim over in bed, scrambling to get out first, and in the process smothering and tangling Jim in the blankets. Grabbing a robe, Khan quickly covered his body as he answered the door, thanking the man for the delivery as he accepted the small cart with their meal.

“Ack! Noonien!” Jim struggled with the new cocoon of covers and finally emerged with crazy bedhead and a wild look in his eyes. “You ridiculous man!” He fired a pillow at Khan and managed to drag himself off the bed and reach for his own robe. “You could have just asked me to stay where I was, you know.” He combed his fingers through his hair to try and get some semblance of order. “Now, where do you want me?” He stood back to let Khan run the proceedings.

Deflecting the pillow, Khan laughed easily. A genuine laugh. "In bed, where I left you!" he barked out with a wolfish grin. Rolling the cart around one side of the bed, Khan lifted the lids, inspecting each dish with his nose and his eyes. It was a strange, yet complimentary, assortment of both Turkish and Indian foods, hot and adding a bit of spice to the filtered starship air.

"Now-" Khan began to arrange the bedding and pillows for Jim on the bed in something of a half circle, "sit here."

Jim took his place in the arrangement and settled comfortably, robe wrapped around him. He sniffed at the air, salivating at the variety of scents from the cart. It was also lovely to know that he didn’t have to check and see that all of the items were Jim-safe, since he knew Khan would take infinite care of his health and never serve anything that might endanger him. “I’m here,” he announced unnecessarily. “Now may I dig in?” He smirked at his lover, figuring Khan had very careful plans.

"No-" Khan scolded, eyeing him as he arranged the foods in order of how he wanted to serve them. "What you may do, is close your eyes." He said, pressing on knee into the bed, while his other foot remained on the floor. "Though, if you do not think you can restrain yourself, I shall need to blindfold you."

Both of Jim’s eyebrows reached for his bangs, and he said, “I’d like a blindfold, please. That’s just more fun. And then I can’t peek, even if I get the urge. Please? Use something of yours...that’s clean.” He smiled wider and winked at Khan. “I promise not to move while you get something suitable.”

"Very well." Khan smiled and left the bedside for a moment. Standing before their shared closet space, Khan considered a moment before reaching for a very dark blue length of silk. It was his, and without explanation Khan had kept as a personal item, a piece of luxury, when everything else was Starfleet issued. But it was all his, even if he never wore it for its intended use.

Returning to the bed, Khan gave Jim a light kiss before blindfolded him, wrapping the silk several times around his eyes before tying it off.

Jim sat still under the application of the blindfold. “Mmm, silk. I can’t think of anything I’ve seen you wear in silk, Noonien, which means you’ve been holding out on me.” He opened his eyes to test the effectiveness. “Yep, can’t see a thing.

"Excellent. Now, let me take care of everything," Khan said, taking Jim by one hand to show that he was not leaving his side. "An appetizer, first." He offered Jim a sweet piece of cake completely soaking in honey.

“Appetizer,” Jim repeated and dutifully opened his mouth for whatever the food item was. He made a deep noise of delight when honey and cake landed on his tongue. He chased after Noonien’s fingers for the last bits of sweet flavor and then moaned when he finished, “Ohmygod, that was the warm-up? I can’t wait to see how you’re going to match that.” He flicked a tongue over his lips.

"Good?" Khan prompted softly as he prepared the next items between his fingers. "Tell me, the texture, how does it taste ... how does it feel against the tongue?" He asked, offering Jim another treat to his lips. Meanwhile, his free hand slid inside Jim's robe and sought out his hip. Thumbing over the joint, Khan leaned in and dragged his tongue over his lover's left nipple, tasting him with a low hum while he fed Jim.

“Mmm, the honey is slick and a little warm,” Jim murmured and then groaned loudly as Khan licked his sensitive nub, arching into the touch. “Fuck, Noonien.” He struggled to do what Khan had asked and said, “The cake is, uh, soft. They’re both sweet; the honey more so than the cake. It’s so good. I want more.” He opened his mouth again, asking for another treat.

As Khan fed Jim the next item, he used his mouth on his lover in the same way Jim did to eat from his hands. He took the time to lick and taste, to let the texture melt against his tongue and linger on his lips. "Now Jim, do you promise to eat everything I offer you?" Khan said with a little purr, licking and sucking at Jim's throat.

Jim leaned his head back and invited more of that luscious mouth on his neck, moaning softly in invitation for Noonien to do more. “I- I do, Noonien. Just don’t stop doing that…” He reached out and gripped at his lover’s side, stroking at the warm skin. “Please. That’s so fucking nice, Noonien. Your mouth.” He took a deep breath and then asked around another low moan, “What’s next? I’ll eat whatever you want.”

"I have something special to present you to, Jim." Khan said, carefully licking the thin wall of muscle along Jim's throat, and lightly biting just under his jaw. "But you will have to wait a moment for me to prepare it properly ... that means taking my mouth off your body for a few minutes." He kissed the side of Jim's neck and nuzzled his nose closer to his hairline.

Jim whined at the idea of losing Khan’s mouth and said, “I don’t know if I can do that, Noonien. Your touch is too good.” He stroked into Khan’s long hair for a moment and tugged lightly at the strands. “Very well. I’ll sit here and be a good boy for you. Just...don’t take too long? I’m already addicted to feeling your mouth on me.”

"You can have my mouth again, Jim. I promise you." With a lingering touch, Khan asked Jim to wait. Then Khan began to shift on the bed, clearly arranging something. "Now, Jim, remove your blindfold. I have a treat for you." Laying on his back, with one knee bent, Khan had placed the rest of the appetizers and entrées on his own body. A small plate lay on his bent knee, a larger one on his hip and over his crotch. Two more small plates on his torso, one on his stomach, the other on the center of his chest, then a bowl in the palm of one hand, leaving the second hand still free. Khan was the place setting, the meal, the server, the exotic centerpiece for Jim to enjoy.

Jim slowly untied and unwrapped the silk blindfold and then set the material aside. He gaped at his lover and then licked his lips again, as his eyes slowly trailed over the whole presentation. “Oh yeah, that’s worth the wait, Noonien. You’re gorgeous.” He rolled forward to his knees and reached out to lightly trail his fingertips over Khan’s exposed skin. “Do you have a suggestion of where I should start because right now, I want to just faceplant on you? And that’ll make a mess.” He examined each plate carefully, inhaling the aroma of each dish.

With his only free hand, Khan reached out to Jim, wanting the contact between them while the rest of his body remained completely still. "My knee- then work your way up." Khan said, his tone quiet and controlled, careful not to let the plates on his body tremble or wobble as he spoke. "Take your time, Jim. There is no rush. I want to see you enjoy yourself." Then with a lick of his lips he added, "And of course, you might consider sharing with me ... let me clean off your fingers for you with my mouth, or get a taste from your lips."

“Noonien,” Jim whispered and moved to press a kiss to Khan’s strong calf. He surveyed the plate on his lover’s knee, instantly making a pleased noise. “Is that a pizza? Can’t be.” He picked up the piece of bread and tore a small bit of it off, popping it in his mouth. “Mmm. Just as good as pizza. This is a perfect choice for me, Noonien. Thank you. What is it called?” Jim asked. He tore another small piece off, reached out and offered another small piece to Khan.

"Turkish Pide is a very simple comfort food-" Khan answered, then ate the bite Jim offered him. "It is quite like pizza, but without the sauce ... common in street markets ... a quick and easy snack to enjoy." In this case, Khan had asked for a very creamy, traditional style of cheese and was very satisfied by the results, as it melted in his mouth.

Jim munched on another bite and then answered Khan’s questions from before. “It’s got an amazing flavor, even without tomato sauce. The cheese is so rich and even though it’s not sharp...the flavor is nice...smooth. And the bread is nicely crunchy, not as much so as crust, but still a good feel under my teeth. This is definitely a winner, Noonien. We’ll have to eat this together again.” He broke off a larger piece to offer his lover, along with his slightly cheesy fingertips.

Careful not to disturb the other foods he still had balanced on his body, Khan chewed slowly, then sucked leisurely on Jim's fingers. His tongue conformed to the digit, the suction holding Jim's finger sweetly with a soft moan. Though despite his best efforts, the plate on his lap shifted somewhat as his cock stirred underneath, needing a little bit more room to grow. "I am pleased that you are enjoying your meal, Jim."

“I’ve only just begun,” Jim said and set the plate safely aside off the bed. He moved sensually, but carefully, around his still food burdened lover to steal a quick kiss. And then he inspected the two plates on his torso, thinking one of those next. He selected the one on his chest, curiously lifting one of the disc-like pieces and inspecting it. “My instinct is always to toss the whole thing in my mouth, but I guess savoring has its place, huh?” he asked with a teasing grin at Khan. He gently took a small bite and lit up a little at the flavor. “Fuck yeah...fried banana, you can never go wrong with that.” He broke the disc in half and offered Khan a large piece.

Instead of taking the offering all in one bite, Khan ate only a portion of it from Jim's fingers at a time. In this way, he too was being attended to, treated to the savoury meal. He ate from Jim's fingers slowly, smiling as it satisfied his memory of the sugary dish. "Yes, it is quite the dessert when served with ice cream and chocolate, but I felt it should be kept simple for this occasion."

“Guess I’m eating it out of order then,” Jim said and popped a whole piece in his mouth, chewing with obvious pleasure. When he finally swallowed, he said, “Does this have a specific name, Noonien? If I know, I can request it again, especially since we both like it.” He offered Khan another, smaller piece, quite enjoying the way his lover savored finger and skin, along with the dessert itself. “I’ve always been glad that I can eat bananas. Would suck to be allergic to them.”

"The order does not matter, as long as you are happy, Jim." Khan licked the corner of his own lips, keeping them clean before taking another offering from Jim's fingers. "It is called unni appam, in India. It can be made with other fruits as well, but banana is the traditional choice. Though there is a similar dessert in Thailand, kluay tod."

Attracted by the flicking of Khan’s tongue, Jim leaned down and did his own thorough cleaning of the area around Khan’s mouth, before delving into his mouth, as well. “Mmm. Might be fun to try all of the different examples of fried bananas from all over the world,” he murmured against Khan’s lips. “In Iowa, we have banana fritters, covered in powdered sugar. So fucking good.” He sat back to break the last unni appam in half and split it between them, before looking over Khan again for his next choice. “You know, I think I want your other hand free to touch me,” he said and moved to inspect the bowl, even as he set the clean plate out of harm’s way.

"Iowa." Khan repeated, the name sounding foreign and out of place on his tongue. "Will you make me foods from your home?" he asked, not wishing to distress Jim by mentioning the time from his youth, but as a genuine wish to share in some of his fonder memories. With his elbow dug in, Khan lifted his forearm steadily, keeping the bowl and its contents level as he lifted it up for further presentation to Jim.

Jim snorted and said, “Let me be honest...there’s not a lot of interest to ever have come out of Iowa. At least, not the backwater I was stuck in. Possibly every recipe for corn that’s possible, so I can show you some of those, if you like.” He dropped his eyes away from Khan’s and stared into space. “The last time I was in Iowa was the day I joined up with Starfleet. Gave the only thing I owned that was important to me, my bike, to some random dude and marched up the shuttlecraft ramp, was a total asshole and told Pike that anything my father had done, I could do better. And look at me, I did. Even managed to come back from being dead, which is something the old man sure as fuck didn’t do.”

Khan could not blame Jim for his anger, after all, Khan still had his buttons too. But he was apologetic for having pushed one of Jim's triggers. Sometimes the way Jim spoke, even out of anger, implied that Jim would rather have his father in his life, rather then those that were saved from his efforts on the USS Kelvin. "I apologize, Jim. I did not mean to upset you." Khan turned his head slightly to look at Jim, remaining motionless before him, even though he wanted to comfort him.

Jim smiled and looked back at Khan, shaking his head a few times. “I used to be so angry, Noonien. So mad I could spit nails…” He stroked the free part of Khan’s chest and said, “It’s pretty hard to maintain that kind of anger now, ya know? Not when I have you and the Enterprise and my crew. All of those things I have because of the way my life’s played out, good and bad. So, maybe I’ll never have a mother or father or brother the way I would have liked, but I have a lover and a family just the same. Best one I could ever ask for.” He sealed their mouths softly, the press of his lips demonstrating how much he felt for Khan.

"Jim-" It did not sound as though his anger had left him. Khan and the Enterprise were important to Jim, yes, but perhaps a little less necessary had George Kirk lived to raise him. Had Jim not been abandoned on Tarsus IV, but remained with his father and mother on Earth, he would have lived a very different life. But these were not things Khan could change, these were not wounds Khan could heal. Silenced by the kiss, Khan kissed him back slowly, hoping to return him to a happier state, no matter how long it took.

“Yes, Noonien?” Jim asked, as he parted their lips again, and pressed his forehead to his lover’s. “What do you wish?” He gently plucked the bowl out of Khan’s hand and turned his head to kiss his palm tenderly. “Do you want to continue with our dinner and forget that I got moody for a moment?”

"I want to make you happy this evening," Khan said, palming the side of his face, thumbing the corner of his lips. "We can stop, if you need a different sort of comfort from me right now. Or we can continue with the meal, if it still interests you." The intention was to pull Jim away from darkness, from miserable feelings of abandonment and old traumas. And if lying naked before his lover with a feast of foods laid out of his body wasn't enough, then Khan would abandon the idea and try something else.

“I am deeply interested and not going to waste this opportunity, nor all your planning, Noonien,” Jim said and kissed his nose. He sat back with the bowl and refocused on the rich scent that wafted from the dish. Plucking one of the balls out, he licked up the drips of sauce that tried to escape, before popping the whole thing in his mouth. He crunched on it and then said, “I have no idea what this is. I thought it was a meatball. But this combination of flavors is rather unique to me.” He offered one just out of the range of Khan’s mouth, letting some of the sauce fall on his lips. “Tell me what it is?”

As long as Jim appeared willing, Khan cautiously agreed to continue as well. But if he felt Jim was just putting on a mask, Khan would put an end to it, all of it. So he watched Jim carefully, experimenting with his food, especially as he attempted to figure out why his tongue was not in agreement with his eyes. So he smiled, parting his lips as he allowed the sauce to drip against his tongue and down the back of his throat. "Mm-" He let the taste linger against his tongue before he swallowed. "It is malai kofta ... it is made entirely of vegetables and cheese and spice." He answered, then parted his lips again, prepared to wait for Jim to feed him again, or not, at his leisure. As powerful as he was, Khan would not take or force anything from his lover, not even food.

“Vegetables?” Jim demanded, scandalized. “Oh, fuck no! I can’t let Bones know about this!” He broke the next vegetableball in two and popped one half in his mouth, before placing the other delicately in Khan’s. “And you know why?” he asked, after swallowing his half. “Because I love it. You, Noonien, are a miracle worker, but I suppose you knew that already.” He swirled one of the balls through the sauce on that dribbled it all over Khan’s chest. “Mmm, saucy Noonien.” His tongue got busy cleaning up the mess he’d just made, before he tossed the whole ball in his mouth to go with it.

Khan finally laughed. Doctor McCoy might be loathe to admit it, but Khan was a good influence on Jim. He was active and fit, he got his proper rest, and ate his vegetables. "I love you, too, Jim," Khan said, curiously watching as the droplets of sauce as they spread out against his skin. Then as Jim jumped right in to clean him with his mouth, Khan dropped his head back down and hummed softly to himself, chest rising and falling as he breathed a little more freely.

Jim rested a hand over Khan’s throat to feel the vibration of his humming, always enjoying the sounds of his lover singing. The laughter warmed him, too, since even now, Khan did not laugh often enough to suit Jim. These small signs of his happiness boosted Jim’s own, and he actively tried to make Khan smile or laugh when they were in private. His lover was too reserved to want to be so emotional in public, but alone, alone he could seek to bring out his lover’s smiles and laughs.

“Only two left,” Jim said with a touch of remorse and looked over both plates. “Which one should we choose? Hmm.” He picked up the one on Khan’s stomach and trailed his fingers over the softness of skin there. “I guess I’m pretty obvious in leaving the best for last. Well, the largest treat, anyway.” He winked at Khan and then surveyed the plate. “This looks lovely. Tell me first what I am about to eat?”

"Dolma, or warak dawali, it is rice wrapped in grape leaves. They can be eaten as they are, or with the yogurt sauce." Khan explained, feeling Jim should try it both ways, as the yogurt sauce had been kept separate in small, shallow dish on the plate along with the dolmas. Khan kept his head turned to the side now, a hand resting on Jim's knee, pleased that his lover was finally managing a decent meal. "Have you truly never had any of these foods?"

“Well, I think I’ve had this. Without the yogurt.” Jim surveyed the dolma closely and then took a large bite of the food. He chewed slowly and said, “Not one of my favorites, I confess. Maybe with the yogurt?” He dipped the rice and leaf and took another bite. “Mmmm, better. But to answer your question, no, the rest I have never had. I only really began exploring the wider universe of food when I joined Starfleet. And I’ve been so wrapped up in alien foods, that I didn’t get that many close to home.” He dipped another leaf and offered it to Khan. “You?”

"I know only Earth based dishes. My experience with alien foods is minimal." He was familiar with a few dishes native to Klingon, but he did not mention them, as that would refer to a time when Jim and Khan had been pitted against one another. "You will have to teach me," he said, taking a bite, enjoying the lemon rice and the baked grape leaves.

“Oh. Yes. That is remiss of me,” Jim mused, watching the way Khan enjoyed his dolma. “There’s so much I can show you...though, we’ll skip some entire cultures, thank you. And vegetarian is not as easy, though of course, there’s all Vulcan foods. I’m allergic to a lot of things, but we can also try some recommendations that only you can eat.” He offered another dolma to Khan, happy to let the augment eat most of them.

“Hey,” he said, gaze having fallen on the main dish still on Khan’s lap, “that looks like meat. You’re not going to share that with me? Looks like...chicken tikka masala. Mmmm. Now, that I’ve had. And it’s amazing. Though not as amazing as what that plate covers.”

"The entree is entirely for you, Jim." Khan said, wanting Jim to feel full and satisfied, and not be restricted by the same dietary restrictions Khan adhered to. Jim had enough limitations about the foods he could consume as it was; there was no sense in restricting him further. Especially not when it made him so delighted. "Though-" Khan added, "under the plate, is entirely yours as well."

“Well, that may be hard to wait on,” Jim said and eyed the plate with hunger for much more than the food. His own cock grew a bit hard at the prospect, and he bit down a soft moan. “But I shall try to eat a bit of the chicken before I get to the main course and dessert in one.” He set aside the dolma and yogurt remains and then fetched a piece of the chicken, sucking off the savory sauce. “Fuck, this is good, more than good. Amazing.”

"Hm, that sounds familiar. I have heard you moan like that before ... but you had something entirely different in your mouth at the time." Khan said with a little smirk. "Now I know ... chicken will do," he teased, truly and sincerely happy to see Jim like this

Jim snorted and try not to cough up chicken, turning his head away from his lover. “I assure you, Noonien, that I am much more enthusiastic in my moaning for you,” he said with a playfully lifted chin, as if in snobbery. But he snagged another piece of chicken, made sure it was drenched in sauce and then moaned with a great deal of pornographic glee.

Meanwhile, one hand snuck just under the plate to explore the area below, finding a warm, thick column of flesh. Even as Jim ate and goofed off, he began to lightly stroke that area with knowing fingers.

"Ah-" Khan struggled to keep still at the touch, watching Jim with eager eyes. His cock stirred again, and to keep the plate from lifting up on one side, Khan parted his thighs a little to allow for a flatter surface. Jim's fingers were warm and slick with traces of sauce, and to be honest, it felt quite good. "Jim." Fisting his hands at his sides, Khan maintained control over himself, instead of rolling his hips into the touch like he wanted. "You don't be too full after all of this, will you? Do you think you will have room for dessert?"

“Dessert?” Jim asked and looked over Khan from head to toes and then back up again, slow and deliberate. He licked his lips hungrily and said, “I’m sure I’ll have room for dessert. Not sure I was going to eat this entire plate of chicken, anyway. This is an enormous platter of chicken. Leftovers for tomorrow!” He enjoyed the idea of not having to leave his room for the day, just lounging with Khan and resting. “Anyway, do tell me what you had in mind for dessert.” His fingers crept down to fondle Khan’s heavy sack, weighing it in his palm and admiring the sheer size.

"The dessert I have in mind for you will be salty at first, then sweet." Khan said with a little smile, pleased by Jim's willingness at this entire arrangement. "Will you allow me to prepare it for you?" He asked, shifting his hips again, unable to resist the more Jim lightly played with him. "Watching how it is made is part of the delicacy."

Jim nodded and removed the platter from Khan, eyes slotting down to watch his erection with hunger. He set it to one side, though close enough to snag a piece or two if he wanted. “I am very eager to see this delicacy made, Noonien. Please, show me.” He settled comfortably to the side and watched his lover with an avid expression. It was hard, of course, to retract his hand from its fondling, but he managed that, as well.

"I hope you will not be disappointed." Khan said, reaching for the bowl that once held the soft, honey soaked cake. A shallow pool of the honey still remained in the dish, and Khan used it entirely, pouring it over his erection. Then putting the bowl aside again, Khan began to stroke himself slowly. With one hand at the base of his shaft and the other just under his balls where Jim's fingers had been, Khan put himself on display for his lover. The small of his back arched off the bed as his hips pushed forward, fucking his long fingers.

“Disappointed?” Jim asked, trying hard not to drool all over himself. “I’m not that stupid.” With all of their joint experience as lovers, he never tired of watching Khan. And it was not the most common part of their repertoire, making this a special treat (yet another one) from Khan to Jim. He reached out to just stroke the corner of Khan’s left hip, which was closest to him, just wanting some physical connection. “Oh fuck, you are so fucking hot, Noonien. Look at how big you are. Damn, I can’t wait for my dessert. It’s going to be so luscious, and I’m going to draw it out as long as I can.”

Having remained still for so long during his presentation of dinner, Khan squirmed against the bed a little more freely now, responding to the touch of his own hands. "Jim-" Khan gasped softly, head tilting back and neck vulnerably exposed. The resistance of the slick honey was just enough to keep Khan from rushing the experience, drawing out each firm stroke of his cock. "Jim-" He groaned his name again, letting his head drop over the edge of the bed, like a man waiting for the guillotine to drop. But offering himself up like this made Khan only harder, the head of his erection swollen and dark red. With his thighs parted a little more, Khan fingered and teased the skin just behind his balls, pressing against the throbbing vein there. "Jim, I love you." He breathed, toes curling into the sheets as his hips slowly bucked. "Ah ... yes ..." He said at last, coming against his own stomach, leaving long strands of slick crisscrossed over his abdomen.

Jim watched the entire proceedings with pure entrancement, murmuring soft encouragement to Khan the entire time without even noticing. His own cock throbbed between his legs, leaking a little at the end. But he didn’t move to touch himself or his lover, beyond the anchoring hand to Khan’s hip, not wanting to break the spell. He couldn’t help the sharp pull of breath when Khan said he loved him, though and answered him back instantly, “I love you, Noonien. So fucking much.” By the time his lover finished, Jim wanted nothing more than to just pounce on him. “Now?” he asked, body trembling with eagerness. “Can I have my dessert now, Noonien?”

"Yes, Jim." Khan said with a sigh, allowing his body to relax back into the bedding underneath him. He wiped some of the excess honey against the inside of his thigh, trusting that Jim would clean him off in good time. "Please ... enjoy." Khan said, surrendering his arms to his sides and laying still once more so that Jim might taste what he wanted from his skin.

Jim shifted to his hands and knees and just surveyed his lover again- the pale skin which covered strong, defined musculature and regal features, topped off with those mesmerizing eyes that could turn dead cold with rage or warm to the height of passion. He started at the top and stole a few languid kisses from Khan’s parted mouth, tongue teasing. And then he explored the column of throat, which contained a hint of salt over the blended flavor that spoke of home and family to Jim. “Guess I should get to the sweet and salty parts, hmmm?” he asked and nipped at a collarbone.

He sidled over to kneel with his legs at Khan’s hips and surveyed the mess he’d made of himself with semen and honey. “You were a bit pent up, Noonien. Splattered all over yourself. Well, can’t let it go to waste.” And that said, he licked up the highest traces of Khan’s release, though he may have detoured a bit to suck at pebbled nipples, leaving them reluctantly to attack the larger areas of semen. “Mmm, this is salty,” he said. “Where’s my sweet?”

A soft, subtle blush spread across Khan's chest as Jim looked him over. It was a hungry, eager look that Khan found encouraging. He moaned into his lover's mouth as they kissed, whispering his name when their lips parted. "Here, my love ..." Khan said, lightly indicating to the inside of his thigh with two fingers. The honey was sticky and starting to dry against his skin. "And here," he said, indicating his still half-hard cock that laid to one side, which he gently stroked once with his thumb.

“Those are very lovely places,” Jim murmured and chased after Khan’s fingers, catching one with his mouth to suck on for a moment. “You are not too sensitive anywhere?” he asked, finger released again. He nosed at the length, impressive in any state and lightly scented of honey His tongue darted out to taste, but he allowed himself only a brief spark of flavor. “You’re sure?” He delved into the crease of Khan’s groin and thigh and it down to try and make a mark right where the honey glistened. His teeth sank in a little and then he scraped them over the entire area, catching honey to savor. “Mmmm, yes, that’s very sweet, Noonien.”

It was good that Jim cleaned his sticky fingers with his mouth, as his hand instinctively moved to the back of Jim's head. "Yes, Jim-" Khan groaned at the slightest tease, fingers clenching in the short blond hair. Jim knew his body far too well. The intimate nuzzling and bites to his skin were very powerful gestures to Khan, making his cock swell again almost instantly, and his thighs part a little more. Khan gave a deep, rich moan, which almost sounded like the rumble of a bear. "Yes, Jim. Good."

Jim thought the noise rather primal and dangerous, too, and lifted his head to survey Khan briefly, pressing into the hand in his hair. He smiled at the sight of Khan’s renewed interest and just couldn’t resist taking his cock in hand and then mouth. He slid down the impressive length, eyes shutting in contentment at the feel and taste. The honey added a new dimension of slick and sweet, over the strong musk and salt that was all Khan. His lips sealed to allowed him to suck at his new treat, this perfect dessert Khan had offered him. Pretty soon, he bobbed his head in time with his sucks, moving a little further down each time until he nosed into crisp, black curls.

The augment had no words now, not even his lover's name on his lips. Only full breaths and a deep purr in his chest as Jim sucked his length. The tongue against his warm muscle was not just cleaning, but tasting this new combination of sweet and salty, and Khan found a deeply relaxing delight at the attention. His fingers clenched and released, then clenched and relaxed again with the bobbing of Jim's head. It was rapture to all of Khan's senses to have Jim's mouth on him like this, more so than Khan coming by his own hands. Like this, his mind was wiped clear of everything except the sweet heat and moist mouth sucking him off. "My Jim."

“Mmmmmm,” Jim hummed around the length and slowly moved up to the very tip. He played with the slit at the head, before pulling off with an obscene noise. “Do you want to come this way, Noonien?” he asked, hand still sliding up and down. “I’m happy to give you that, if you want. Or to move on to other things. Tell me, Noonien. Please.” He took the very head of Khan’s cock into his mouth again and power vacuumed, as Khan made a decision.

"Your mouth is always a pleasure, Jim ..." Khan gave a deeply content sigh as he let his hand fall away from the back of Jim's head. It was hard to want anything else when his mouth was so perfect. It was a happy luxury Khan would always desire. "But it doesn't seem fair to make you keep eating, when you've finished your dessert." Khan slid a hand up his own torso, nails lightly scratching at his own nipples and across his chest. "But that bite, Jim ... I will need you soon, unless you tell me no."

“No way I’m going to tell you no, Noonien,” Jim said and followed Khan’s hand up, until he was hovering over Khan on all fours. He didn’t settle his weight or push Khan down into the mattress, waiting for a sign that Khan would not mind that action. His lover was still sometimes uncertain about being pinned or in any way dominated. And even though Jim knew this was for him, he always respected those aspects of Khan. He did, however, allow his own rather neglected erection to rub along the soft skin of Khan’s stomach. It left a leaky trail behind it, marking Khan in a subtler way. “What really seems unfair is that you have not eaten a full meal yourself, Noonien, while you have been lavishing me with so much attention.” He nibbled at Khan’s mouth and then tilted his head for a kiss, opening to invite Khan to take charge for the moment.

Lifting his head slightly, Khan looked down between their bodies, licking his lips as he watched Jim rub against him. His hands reached forward for his lover, rubbing against the small of his back, encouraging Jim to press down, wanting his weight and the feeling of his erection sliding against his skin. Then lifting his gaze, Khan utterly fixated on Jim's mouth just before it was offered to him to kiss. But when their lips touched, Khan groaned happily, sucking on Jim's tongue, enjoying the taste of everything Jim had sampled for dinner that evening.

Jim gratefully eased himself down to press their skin together all along torso, groin and parts of leg. His hips bucked forward at the touch, and he moaned into the kiss at the pleasure that circuited up from his cock. He lifted his left leg along Khan’s side and braced it higher than his right, opening himself up for more touches, allowing him to rub a little more forcefully against his lover’s body. “You like biting, hmm?” he asked when their mouths parted to give him a breath. “Want me to bite more of you, Noonien?”

"Yes, Jim, yes." Khan answered a little too quickly. Jim's bites were a sharp, fiery awakening to each nerve, making Khan completely wild, just under the surface. The large palms of his hands smoothed over the round orbs of Jim's ass, squeezing and rubbing, keeping their bodies pressed together the more Jim rubbed and thrust against him. Meanwhile his own erection was happily trapped between them, pressing into the heat of his lover's body with each roll of their hips. "Yes-" Khan eagerly nuzzled their faces together, wanting that mouth, those lips on him again.

Jim laughed a little at the eagerness, but it was a laugh of delight, not mockery. How could he help but feel so when Khan shared and mirrored his emotions so completely? He pressed back into the hands on his ass, though he then thrust right back into the firmness of Khan’s cock again. “I do like that, too,” he murmured and kissed him briefly. He nipped at the fuller lower lip of that bow-shaped mouth, a little harder than he might normally. And then, daring and mischievous alike, he snaked his head around to clamp his teeth down firmly on Khan’s neck, right at the tendon.

The playful bites to his mouth and lips made Khan smirk, as he pretended to avoid Jim's mouth by turning his head slightly away. The few light growls might even sound disapproving, but the truth was that Khan delighted in this sort of play. So when Jim took his advantage and bit his neck, just under his jaw, Khan surrendered a deep groan. The tip of his tongue ventured to moisten his lips as he gave a hard swallow. It was both calming and exciting to the augment. Jim had him, literally by the throat, and it felt so good. His fingers dug into the flesh of Jim's ass, kneading and fondling as his own hips rolled under his lover.

Jim had learned most of Khan’s more primal noises, especially his large array of growls. In the wrong context, Khan’s anger could erupt as a deep, threatening growl, one that raised the hairs on the back of the neck of any sane person. But when they were in bed together, Khan’s growls usually indicated more pleasurable sensations, and Jim sought out all of their different forms. He smiled at the moan, as well, and pulled back enough to lick over the mark, sad that it would fade away so quickly. “Mmm, that’s right.” He captured Khan’s mouth again and slid his tongue in deep.

Khan agreed, opening his mouth to Jim, welcoming him in, sucking on his tongue lovingly. With his mouth safely gagged, occupied by Jim's tongue, distracting him, feeding his fixation on his lover's mouth, Khan eased his grasp and smoothed his hand over Jim's ass. Palming the skin, Khan rubbed his hands up and down the small of Jim's back, worshiping the arch and with the movements of his hands, encouraging them to roll against one another at the same pace. His eyelids blinked closed as he kissed Jim, a hot shiver rolling down his back and settling just behind his hips. It was bliss to have Jim's weight pressed against him like this, kissing deeply, and still feeling the pleasant sting of the bite. It was the sort of experience that made the augment lose track of time, unless Jim stopped him, Khan would slip into an endless cycle, touching and kissing like this until he no longer drew breath.

But Jim ran out of breath first and pulled away with a gasp, head spinning a little. “Fuck, you’re making me dizzy, Noonien,” he murmured, filling his lungs with air. “You’re as randy as I’ve ever seen you. Been sneaking aphrodisiacs?” He scraped his teeth playfully over Khan’s chin and then kissed the very tip. “Do you want me to ride you? Take that big cock into my ass and just bounce up and down on you. Would let me bite still and kiss and scratch over your skin. I could make you tingle everywhere. I know how sensitive your body is to every sensation.”

"Dizzy?" Khan asked, barely aware Jim was speaking at first. He had allowed himself to drown in the taste of his lover that his other senses had come secondary. "You are my aphrodisiac, my Jim," he said by way of answer, still completely drunk on this sort of intimacy. Though the playful bite caught his attention, it always would. His eyes dilated suddenly, "Yes-" Khan said, pawing at Jim's sides, palming and caressing his hip. "I need you, Jim. I need you very badly."

“You have me, Noonien,” Jim assured softly and eased over to reach for their bedside table and the lubricants in the drawer. He pulled out one of the small vials, a special oil that both of them enjoyed a great deal. “Do you want to prepare me?” He flicked off the small cork and sat up, gently easing himself back so that Noonien could reach his ass, and he could slick his lover’s cock. They always needed a good amount of lubrication to fit Khan’s impressive girth comfortably inside.

A bit of oil splashed over said cock, as Jim tipped the vial and let just enough spill to begin spreading it over the warm, hard length with one hand. “Oh, you are nice and hard for me, Noonien. And so hot. This is going to feel lovely battering into me.” He tilted a little more oil into his hand and then offered the rest to Khan.

As Jim lubed him up, Khan only got harder in his lover's hands. The oil made his cock glisten, slick and wet, easier for Jim to take. Though as Jim prepared Khan, the augment took took care to prepare Jim as well. With one hand, he cupped the underside of his shaft and balls, gently fondling and pressing while he used two fingers of his free hand to rub the oil against Jim's ass, fingering him open so that there were no dry spots. "You are in for a nice, hard ride my love."

“Yes, I can tell,” Jim said approvingly. “I’m just not sure your stamina is going to hold out this time.” He winked at Khan to show he was teasing and then pressed harder into the fingers entering his body. His body undulated into the preparation, and he groaned loudly as they found his prostate. “Are you going to help me move?” he asked on a low, throaty moan. “Use your strength to force my body up and down on your cock?” He reached out to stroke over one of the strong arms.

"Yes, Jim." Khan hummed softly, fingering him a moment more, proud at how well Jim always opened up to him. "But first, let's get you seated comfortably," he said, slowly pulling his fingers out so that Jim wouldn't close up on him too quickly. Then angling himself with one hand and guiding Jim by the hip with the other, the head of his erection slid against his lover's entrance with ease. "Sit back, Jim," he said, as his desire was to watch Jim impale himself.

“Noonien,” Jim sighed and then slowly eased himself back, letting gravity do much of the work. There was the slightest spark of pain at the first penetration, but then practice and preparation made the rest of the way a smooth glide. He braced himself on Khan’s chest as his hips and ass settled. “Oh, fuck, now I’m seated comfortably,” he said and then keeping to his word, he curled his fingers and deliberately scraped from Khan’s shoulders to where they were joined. He deliberately pinched and twisted the sensitive nipples on the way, wanting to bring Khan’s pleasure to a boiling point.

"Yes-" Khan purred darkly. "Yes, you are," he said with an initial thrust, making sure Jim wouldn't be bucked off on the first go. But there wasn't a chance of that; Jim knew how to ride Khan, knew how to keep his knees in close. Then with a wolfish grin, Khan began to thrust into his lover, stretching the tight resistance of his ass. "Good, Jim..." While the phrasing of his praises sometimes sounded simple, they were in fact spoken as if Jim were the most divine being in existence, spoken to with reverence and devotion and praise. Khan bucked slightly under Jim as the scratches over his chest began to draw him out again, becoming more possessive and hungry for his young lover.

“Oh, fuck, you are demanding tonight, Noonien,” Jim said and bounced up and down on Khan’s cock, arching his back into the movement. He tried to keep caressing Khan with his hands, though he sometimes had to just brace himself on a particularly delicious thrust. “You’re good, too, Noonien. So fucking amazing, taking me so hard and so deep. God, you’re so huge and hard.” He deliberately clamped around that thick impalement, trying to get a little of his own back. Besides, he could tell that Khan was sliding toward his more feral state, and Jim adored that during their couplings. “Need you, Noonien. Make me forget everything but you.”

"Jim," Khan growled. A gear in his brain shifted at the new instruction. His fingers curled against Jim's hips, helping to pull him down every time Khan's thrust pushed him away. But it wasn't enough, how could Jim forget about everything else when he was riding on top? There was too much else to see, too much else that could distract him. So Khan arched his back off the bed, rolling them until Jim was on his back and Khan fucking him between his parted thighs. There now, the rest of the world was blocked out of sight, there was nothing before Jim, except for Khan. There was nothing to hide behind, not when there was only Khan's fiercely intense gaze staring right at him. "You belong to Khan," he said, hand firmly on his lover's chest, keeping him pinned down. But when that wasn't enough, Khan pressed his wide hands against the underside of Jim's thighs, pushing his knees back so that they were almost touching his chest, forcing Jim into a tight ball on the mattress.

Well, he’d done it that time, all right, Jim’s brain acknowledged muzzily, as he was manhandled from one position to another and finally into a ball that made him a near pillbug. Later, he would be grateful for his own flexibility, but for now, his world really had narrowed down to nothing but his lover. Khan was in him, on him and the focus of his senses, which he sealed by hooking his arms around the back of Khan’s neck and holding on tight.

And oh, the proclamation that he belonged to Khan. His own body trembled at the notion, tremors that danced up and down his spinal column and limbs. “Yes, Noonien,” he answered softly, wanting to speak to that claim. “You’re mine, too,” he reminded him on a harsh breath and tugged hard at his hair. “Please, take what we both need, Noonien!”

With their faces pressed close together, Khan nodded, kissing the side of Jim's face over and over. Jim was his. Would always be his. There was no taking that back, no undoing. Whatever Jim needed, in a lover, or friend, or someone to argue with, Khan would be that person. Just as Jim would be that person for Khan. "Yes ... need you." Khan was quite rough with Jim just then, but only because he knew he could take it. Jim wasn't afraid. Jim could handle him. He rode Jim hard, taking his ass over and over. Letting loose frustrated, wild growls, Khan truly let go. His body lurched as he began to come, a powerful orgasm shaking him so hard his fingertips trembled against Jim's chest.

This was as hard as Khan ever claimed his body, but Jim knew that he would never be hurt by his lover. The first indication of true pain, and Khan would stop and be upset, as well. So, he clung and took everything Khan gave, even trying in his completely awkward position to meet some of those incredible thrusts. He clawed at Khan’s shoulders, neck and back, tugged on his hair and tried to show in every way that this was all right, that this was fabulous even. His ass was going to ache like a son-of-a-bitch, but it was worth it for the way Khan looked, the way he sounded and felt. Jim would do anything for this.

And then he was coming, aware of Khan’s wild noises in his ears, the signals of the augment’s own release upon him. Upon them both, as Jim knew he would overflow with the release, would leak all over the bed. “Yes, Noonien!” he screamed, glad for soundproof walls. “Yes! Please! FUCK!”

As the last throbbing waves of his orgasm left him and his body was left radiating heat, Khan slumped against his lover. Breathing hard, Khan pressed his face close to Jim's neck, kissing gently and nuzzling, happily taking on his sweat and his scent. "Jim. Jim, I love you. I love you, Jim," Khan said, in every combination of those important words and his lover's name. Pressing the palm of his hands against Jim's cheek, Khan curled in close, not wishing to pull away from Jim for anything. The augment had truly made a mess of Jim's ass, so stretched open that his seed was dripping out.

But now came the aftercare.

Jim breathed even harder, body driven hard by their wild coupling. He clung to Khan, but hoped the augment might let him out of his curled state soon. His entire being still thrummed with the pleasure of intense orgasm, but he knew that soon he would be sore. But for the moment, he was content, still rocked by aftershocks and with Khan whispering words of love in his ears. “Yes, Noonien,” he slurred. “Love you, too. So much.” With a weary motion, he turned his head to press sleepy kisses to that beloved face, catching cheek, chin, beside his eye, nose, wherever his lips happened to glance.

Now that his intense libido had been satisfied, Khan was a much calmer man once more. Reason returned to him. Relaxing his hold on Jim's legs, Khan rubbed them soothingly, apologetic of the finger sized bruises he left behind from his claw-like grasp, and helping to ease any cramps he might have caused from holding Jim down so firmly. With a very relaxed groan, Khan helped Jim stretch out his legs, quite insistent on touching and kissing him all over.

"You deserve a medal for that one, Jim." Khan said, attempting to be playful, knowing it was often a good way to distract Jim from any discomfort.

Jim groaned softly at the stretching, relieved to be out of the pillbug position. He opened one eye to gaze blearily at Khan and said around a yawn, “You were on your Wheaties that time, weren’t you?” He reached down to touch at the spots that would surely bruise and smiled a little. “I’m well a truly marked everywhere with your claim.” He didn’t mind in the slightest, hoping that at last, all of the excess energy and emotions from their experiences on Tarsus might have been expended. Well, at least, in the corner of mind that still functioned, he thought about that. The rest of him was too tired and satiated to render much thought at all.

“Gonna clean me up ‘fore I pass out?” he asked Khan.

"Yes, my love," Khan said, kissing a few beads of sweat away from the side of Jim's face. Using the towels from before, Khan patted Jim dry, down his chest and between his legs. Then discarding everything that was remotely damp or soiled, Khan gathered the blankets around Jim and himself, tucking them in tight and warm. "It was not my intention to wear you out, but it is for the best, I think." It had been a long few days for them both, and if this was the way to get Jim exhausted enough to sleep, then all the better.

And since Jim was too tired to appreciate it now, Khan then added, "Tomorrow, I am going to use my mouth all over you, Jim. Would you like that?" he asked, snuggling in close to his lover, holding him with warm arms.

“Always,” Jim murmured and snuggled in closer to the other man. “Talk tomorrow, too.” He curled his hands under Khan’s broad chest, completely relaxed and content with the other man. “‘S lot to say. ‘Bout everything.” He yawned again and just went boneless, worn out in mind and body. Fortunately, he associated Khan with home and safety and had no trouble dropping right into a deep sleep.

 

*            *            *

 

Shifting in bed, Khan readjusted his hold on Jim. He was mostly awake, but kept his eyes closed as his lips twitched and sometimes brushed against the back of Jim's shoulder or neck. The augment had managed a much needed deep sleep, body relaxed and feeling at peace as a result of the previous night's activities. And while normally, Khan would have attempted to get out of bed by this hour, or at least affectionately wake Jim up, this morning he was quite content to lay in bed, breathing in and out slowly as he remained at rest with the man he loved.

Jim slept much longer than Khan and awoke slowly, mumbling to himself in his half-sleep and shuffling even closer to the warm, hard object behind him. By the time he opened gummy eyes, he was practically using Khan as another form of covers, so tightly was he jammed against him. He felt no urgency to move, despite a bit of urging from his bladder, safe and warm and a bit achey from the previous night’s activities. So, he allowed himself to linger in a pleasant half-doze, until he was afraid he might wet the bed. Then, he dug himself out from under Khan and covers and stumbled with a conspicuous lack of grace to the refresher.

Normally, if Jim got out of bed during a sleep cycle, Khan would sit up instantly and ask where Jim was going. Sometimes the answer was simple, that Jim simply needed to relieve his bladder, or get a drink of water, while other times it was because of a priority call being patched through to him personally, or a near emergency situation. Sometimes Khan got an incoherent, almost non-English answer about Jim needing to piss, and other times it was a rushed apology for waking him up before Jim was called to duty.

This morning however, Khan didn't ask where Jim was going when he suddenly left bed, but he did sit up to watch him hobble away. And though it might be rude, it did make Khan smile to himself. As he waited for Jim to return to bed, Khan pulled some of the blankets back, keeping the warm spot Jim had left behind, ready for him upon his return.

A few moments later, Jim returned and nearly nose-dived back under the covers with a groan. “Oh my fucking god,” he groaned, “everything hurts. I am having your cock declared a weapon of mass destruction.” He buried his face in his pillows and just lay there like a lump on a log.

His body was a bit of a sight- hair going every which way in its customary bedhead, bruises sprinkled all over in testament of Khan’s possessive nature, ass red between and around his rather rounded cheeks and a few fading marks from his time on Tarsus for good measure. Still, it was obvious from his posture that whatever aches he might be suffering, Jim wasn’t exactly distressed about his current condition.

Placing a hand on Jim's shoulder, Khan peeked over his body. It took him a moment, but he soon determined that the way Jim was hurting was desirable. "I wish to ease your pains, Jim." Khan said, reaching over and petting some of his bed head to one side, the pads of his fingers lightly massaging his scalp. "May I massage your back? Tell me, and I will do it."

Jim flopped his head to the side and smiled at Khan, eyes soft through their bleariness. “Thank you, Noonien. I think that would be perfect right now. My ass could use a little of that soothing ointment we have, too. Stuff works miracles…” He yawned in the middle of the sentence and trailed off, before blinking a few more times. “Be a nice relaxing time to talk, too, about everything. As long as you don’t mind, of course.” He offered a warm smile to Khan, wanting to keep at bay any demons he may be facing from their experiences at Tarsus. Still, it was time to debrief, informally, and make sure nothing lingered.

Pulling himself from bed, Khan moved to retrieve the ointment that always added a pleasantly warm, and also numbing sensation to any massage. When he returned to bed, Khan got back under the covers, and slid next to Jim. "What would you like to talk about?" Khan asked, warming the ointment between the palms of his hands before he applied it to Jim's lower back, massaging the deep tissue there first before he slowly worked his way up the length of his back.

Jim moaned gratefully as the first effects of Khan’s massage and the ointment began to take hold and settled very happily under his touch. “That was just a fucked up bunch of days we spent,” he said. “Me hitting you with all of my crap and then Kodos. That’s as close as you’ve come to truly going feral on me in a long time, Noonien. I wanted to make sure you're well...no lingering effects. Last night, well it was amazing, but it made me think you might not be completely settled in your mind. I know I’m not, but I want to be before we head off again. Enough to leave everything in the dust here.”

Khan paused, thumbs straddling Jim's vertebrae. This was not the conversation he had expected. "I thought you wanted me to be rough." A chill ran down his own back, mind twisting in knots at the mere implication that Jim had not wanted Khan like that after all. "It felt good to let go, to know you could handle me. My actions with you last night were not out of anger, Jim. I was not taking the events of the last few days out on you. I was sharing-" he said, then corrected, "I thought I was sharing an experience with you. To cleanse our bodies and our minds of everything else, except one another. Was that not what you wanted?"

Jim made a soothing noise and said, “It was, Noonien. I didn’t mean to imply that you hurt me or took any negative feelings out on me, like some kind of punishment. We both needed cleansing...yeah, that’s the right word for it. I just want to be sure you feel cleansed...that you’ve left it all behind you now.” He reached out for one of Khan’s hands, a bit awkwardly from his position. “And I’m definitely going to want you to let go more often. You wouldn’t hurt me, Noonien. You’d know, if something wasn’t what I wanted.” He smiled at the augment, touched by just how sensitive his lover was to any hint that Jim had been injured- emotionally or physically.

Visibly relieved, Khan pressed their faces together, noses brushing. To say Jim was important to him would be a vast understatement. Jim was his absolute priority. His care was paramount. Whether it was in the form of eating and sleeping, sex or cuddling, talking or listening, Khan wanted to provide Jim what he needed. Therefore, it also meant that the augment held himself highly accountable if anything went wrong.

"I will be glad to leave this place in the dust, as you say. I will not think on it again, unless there are nights you need to talk, and I will listen. As I said on the planet, Jim, it is an honour and a privilege to have your trust in this area. It is my hope that I will continue to be the person you come to, when you need things that no one else will understand, that you perhaps cannot even explain or rationalize to yourself. I want to help you through them."

Jim scooted and then rolled so he could wrap his arms around Khan, stroking his hair. He, too, valued his lover highly, but unlike Khan (who was now exiled from his family), Jim had his crew and the Enterprise, too. But he understood that he had become the focus of Khan’s existence, which humbled him, as well as angered him at the betrayal of those Khan loved. He would never understand their abandonment of someone who had suffered so much and worked so hard for their interests. They had gotten a planet and a new life, but sent Khan packing. Jim would be hard pressed to come up with words strong enough for how little he thought of them for their actions.

Khan’s statement well considered, Jim nodded and said, “I do feel better, like a lot of the weight from all those years ago is lifted, but I guess I have to accept that I’ll never truly be rid of the stain. And accept that I did all I could to help the other kids. That’s what’s hardest. At least I can talk about it now, acknowledge it to the universe. Speak the names of the other people I knew, the people who never made it off. Someday, I’ll tell you about the person on Tarsus who taught me so many languages...Hoshi Sato, but not today.”

"You are correct, it is a weight that will never truly leave you. But it is one that you no longer need to be bear in silence, alone." Since they were now facing one another, Khan pressed his hands to the flat of Jim's chest, spreading some of the residue of the ointment over his torso, gently working into the muscles as they spoke. "I will listen, Jim, when you are ready." His hands slid up to Jim's shoulders, digging in a little more then, wanting to address the knots there. "What else would you like to talk about this morning?" he asked, wondering if he had expressed everything that had been on his mind this morning, before Khan suggested something else.

Jim writhed a little in happy reaction to the new touches and sighed at the warm numbing sensation over tired muscles. “Kodos,” he said finally. “He had a daughter, Noonien. Admiral Lee told me about her before we left. She’s an actress, apparently. Starfleet doesn’t seem to know if she was aware of her father’s identity or not. Hell, they’re not even sure if she’s his biological daughter or some kid he stole from Tarsus or somewhere else…” He heaved a breath and then scowled. “It just doesn’t seem right that Kodos got to have a life, a child, when his actions meant so many other people didn’t get the chance. Do you think...if she knew who her father was, should she be considered criminal for not turning him in?”

"It is a difficult thing..." Khan said slowly, "...family." His hands paused in their actions once more, resting on Jim's shoulders. "People are often forgiving toward family, no matter their faults." Khan thought on his own people and how his bonds to them had been severed. "We protect those we love, even if they are not worthy of our protection, or our love. If she knows her father, if she knows of his crimes, and made no attempt to contact authorities, then she was aiding and abetting, and in a sense a profiteer of his crimes, and therefore, can be held responsible to some degree. Or more severely, if there is evidence that she helped him outright, supported his goals. However, if she had no knowledge of who her father was, in life or death, it would be in poor taste to tell her now."

Jim felt a pang for bringing up family to Khan, but it was something that troubled him. “Yeah, if she didn’t know, it would be needlessly cruel to bring it up now. I wonder if she’ll ever know what happened to him…” He stroked Khan’s chest in a way that was meant to soothe them both. “But you’re right, family is a powerful thing. I don’t know if there’s much of anything I wouldn’t do for you, Noonien. I know I’d rip worlds apart to help you, to save you, if you ever had need of it. That’s how strong my feelings are. And I know it’s the same for you, too. Parity of emotions.” He cupped Khan’s face and urged him down for a kiss.

"Yes, Jim," Khan whispered before their kiss. It was meant in agreement, that yes, he knew Jim's loyalty towards him, and yes, Khan would do the same. After a few lingering kisses and brushes of their lips, Khan felt the need to add to the conversation, a truth he had been holding on to for some time. "You should know, Jim...you did save me. When I was alone and hurting, you offered me friendship and kindness. It saved my life."

Jim flinched a little at the implication, the idea that his fearless warrior might have taken his own life, should Jim have not offered him a home and friendship. “I am so grateful I did, Noonien. I can’t even bear the thought…” He caressed Khan’s cheeks with the back of his right hand, the touch tender to go with his emotions. “You are the best thing in my life. I have the Enterprise, her crew and Starfleet, but there’s no comparison. This ship gave me a home, but you gave me someone to share it with.”

Khan gave a single nod, but matched it with a small smile as well. The augment felt the same way. His smile grew the more he thought about a life with Jim, a long life. "Now, Jim, shall I finish giving you that massage? There is no rush, no demand on us today. I wish to keep you relaxed in bed, cuddled together for a long as you can stand."

“Indeed, Noonien, I think I can stand that for a very long time,” Jim said with the warmest smile yet for his lover. “Shall I roll back over?” He moved to do so, waiting for a cue as to what Khan might prefer to begin. “I didn’t mean to derail your efforts.”

"I pushed you hard last night. And you were asleep before I had a chance to attend to your aftercare needs." Khan said as he positioned himself to sit and straddle the back of Jim's calves. Then beginning again, Khan began to work the tissue at the base of his lover's back, working his way up, massaging the complex strands of muscle with skilled hands.

“I think that was the sign of a job well done,” Jim complimented and stretched out comfortably under the attention, head resting on the pillow again. “In fact, perfectly done. Exactly what I needed after stressful days and nights dealing with Tarsus. My Noonien…” The name trailed off as Khan’s hands worked their magic on Jim’s flesh. He drifted into the most contented state of relaxation, soothed into a near meditative state.

The Enterprise continued to orbit Tarsus IV with all its nightmarish past, and any crewmember who wished could look out one of the view windows and see the planet, floating so innocuously in space. But to Jim and Khan in that moment, it might as well have been galaxies away…


End file.
